THE NEXT GOVERNMENT.

BARISAN RAKYAT SHALL FORM THE NEXT GOVERNMENT!

SOS

SOS
nation in distress

The World Anthem


WE ARE ALL OF 1 RACE, THE HUMAN RACE.


07/05/2013

NAJIB PERFORMS WORSE THAN BADAWI. WILL NAJIB JUMP SHIP OR MAHATHIR/UMNO PUSH HIM OUT?!

by julius maha muhy caesar salad, Donplaypuks®, intrepid correspondent for front and back and all over stabbing affairs




Shortly following the 2008 General Elections, the UMNO leadership had collectively agreed to an orderly exit for Badawi by June 2010 as punishment for his dismal GE12 performance. But, Muhyiddin and Rafidah could not wait and with unrestrained haste and glee, plunged the proverbial Kris into Badawi's back, paving the way for his "premature exit" from office!!

However, the real architect of Badawi's demise was none other than ex-Prime Minister, Mahathir Mohamad, who found retirement no fun. Mahathir fumed over Anwar Ibrahim's acquittal by the Federal Court and release from prison. The judicial review over the 1998 sacking of then Chief Justice Salleh Abbas, government apology and compensation of RM10 million was a direct slap in the face for Mahathir, who had orchestrated the whole affair to save his premiership. The Royal Commission of Inquiry (RCI) into corruption in the Judiciary and the Lingamgate affair exposed Mahathir's Machiavellian machinations in emasculating the Judiciary completely, not to mention utterly corrupting it.

Attacks on Mahathir's legacy were only one worrying aspect to him. But he really swung into action when hit in the wallet. Badawi had correctly cancelled Mahathir's mad hatter's scheme for a $1 billion 'Crooked Bridge (and phoney crony contract) Over Troubled JB Waters'. Mahathir's sons also found that preferential treatment was no longer being accorded to them by GLC's and government where highly profitable monopolistic contracts worth $ billions were concerned. Mahathir claimed he was asked to beg Badawi's infamous son-in-law for scraps! That was the last straw. 

I had said well before GE 2013 that if Najib performs worse than Badawi did it 2008, then the 'night of the long knives' will be re-enacted soon by UMNO. Muhy is still there, with his fat and hungry looks. And thankfully, Najib has responded magnificently:
 
1. Najib/BN secured fewer seats in GE13 than in GE12 - 133 vs 140.  
2. Najib/BN secured a lower % of registered votes - 47% vs 50%  
3. Najib/BN failed to get 2/3 majority.  
4. Najib/BN failed to wrest back the key states of Selangor and Penang.
5. Can anyone recall another GE where BN lost more Ministers, Deputy Ministers and Chief Ministers? 

Ergo, Najib will not last in office long, as the UMNO elite are busy now sharpening their knives for the long unheld UMNO elections, postponed repeatedly by the testicularly challenged Najib.  

Watch the sandiwara as it unfolds. A Government of Thieves and its rogue leader PM (and his $150K birkin handbag toting FLOM/FLOP/FLOCU (first lady of curtin uni) cannot, shall not, endure. Believe me, this like so many of the laws of physics, is universal.

That, my friends, is the silver lining behind the dark clouds of GE13!

Donplaypuks® and cheat at general elections and everything else too, and hope to prosper long, man!

04/05/2013

BARISAN/PAKATAN RAKYAT WINS GE13 HANDSOMELY! UMNO/BN - A GOVERNMENT OF THIEVES - IS HISTORY, BURIED FOR GOOD!

by Donplaypuks®, intrepid correspondent for general election affairs


An ex-school mate and long-time friend of mine queried me on Facebookabout about my "deafening silence" following the general elections announcement by that most disgraceful of UMNO/BN nominated prime ministers, Najib Tun Razak. Najib is to serial lying, thieving and economic plundering what Stalin, Hitler and Mao were to genocide, and Bernie Madhoff was, to mega ponzi-scheme conning, looting and freeloading on our, the citizens', hard earned money. 

It's really amazing that despite having been lied to consistently and persistently about everything from murder to sodomy to economics, government finances and the state of the nation, some Malaysians should seriously entertain thoughts about voting for UMNO and Najib when he barefacedly lies about building 1 million homes "for the People" IF UMNO/BN wins the election, and IF, they retain him as prime minister. 

Since April 2009 when Najib succeeded Badawi as PM, has he been responsible for building 250 homes for the people? No! So, why should any sane person fall for this last-minute "1 million homes" desperate lying? Remember that shortly before GE 12 in 2008, Badawi pulled out of thin air in a matter of hours, not 1, not 2, not 3, but 4 Economic Corridors - Northern, Eastern, Sarawak and Sabah - with a promise of trillions of dollars (which no Malaysian government has ever had) of economic development and zillions of jobs which never materialised. What a humbug!

Do you remember that crook Mahathir's 1999 promises to Su Qui if the Chinese voted for him, and then his back-stabbing them post-elections saying he would not deliver on blackmail terms? Najib's impossibe promises, to the Rakyat and now that scumbag Waythamoorthy's and his Hindraf demand deal, belong right up there in that class of plain lying. Lying and cheating the citizens on a multi-billion dollar scale has become the preferred culture within UMNO/BN.

Had I been bought by UMNO/BN to be quiet? My reply to my friend was that there was not enough money in the world to tempt me. I have not been writing to bring down this UMNO/BN Government of Thieves since 2007, only to falter or succumb to unconscionable bribery at the eleventh hour!

No,  Najib's finally announcing the election date was a sort of ant-climax to me. My battle, for the moment, is over. It is now up to the PEOPE to see reason and act accordingly at the poll booths.

I will stick my neck out and predict that the Opposition, in the form of Barisan/Pakatan Rakyat will win GE 13 handsomely. UMNO/BN and its government of thieves will be buried for good, and consigned to the footnotes of history and its Recycle Bin.

Do I have a special crystal ball? No, but every fibre of my being tells me the moment has arrived. Believe me people, it is now. Don't doubt it. Tell all your friends and acquaintances and the doubters to get off the fence. 

Tell them so that one day they can tell their children and grandchildren that when the time came and they had to stand firm and tall against one of the most pernicious of evil rogue regimes in human history, they did not falter or blink!

Vote this thieving UMNO/BN and boot that snake oil salesman and racist, bigoted, lying and stealing ali baba Najib and his thieves OUT, OUT, OUT, forever! The die is cast.

For God is surely on our side, the side of the good and the decent!


Donplaypuks® with voting and elections, Man!

28/04/2013

1MDB - A RM20 BILLION FINANCIAL MELTDOWN FIASCO WAITING TO HAPPEN? WHY YOU SHOULD VOTE PAKATAN IN & NAJIB & BUMNO/BN OUT, OUT, OUT TO OBLIVION!

by bernie madhoff, Donplaypuks® intrepid genius financial correspondent for $20 billion james bond affairs

Malaysians have plenty to worry about 1MDB's bond issues totalling some RM20 billion to-date, 100% guaranteed by you and me through sovereign gurantees so generously approved by PM Najib. According to KiniBiz (CLICK HERE), there are allegations that 1MDB's secretive and over-the-odds ways of pricing bonds and raising funds and investing may well be laying the foundation for a giant ponzi scheme sting.

Originally, 1MDB was called TIA (Terengganu Investment Authority). The Federal Government was supposed to pay TIA the royalties due from Petronas to Terengganu, to be invested in a sovereign fund, for the benefit of its people. Najib then hijacked the idea, cancelled TIA and created 1MDB, a Federal entity under his control, now supposedly a sovereign fund for the benefit of all Malaysians. 

This of course completely ignored and bypassed Khazanah, the Government's investment arm, since that's exactly what it is supposed to do - invest Taxpayer's money in viable projects for the benefit of all Malaysians. But then cunning, thief-minded and serially lying Najib did not wish for TIA, with its billions of ringgit, to be managed at State level in a transparent and accountable manner. Our former Agong and King of Terengganu had already as far back as 2008 shown his independent mind by refusing to accept UMNO's preferred candidate for the post of Menteri Besar (Chief Minister). By moving it to Federal level, Najib could manipulate the funds in total secrecy without worrying about Terengganu and Royal whistleblowers.

When IMDB's CEO, Directors, "Advisors" and Trustess (one of whom is PM Najib) all bleat the same tune - that the accounts have been audited by an international firm, and filed in accordance with company law - we have much to worry about. Not only because these accounts filed with the ROC (Registrar of Companies) are in the abbreviated form. Such accounts do not tell us who the bonds were issued to at fanciful discounts and interest rates, why funds were raised overseas at interest rates way above international norms or why foreign countries are issuing default guarantees and at what reward to them. These audited accounts cannot explain why 1MDB paid over the odd premiums (billions of ringgit) to acquire IPP's (Independent Power Producers) owned by UMNO-linked cronies and that are due to expire in a few years,when by holding out they could have it for a song!

Most importantly, it does not tells us if 1MDB was forced to appoint a certain local bank controlled by the brother of a prime minister, with exclusive rights to its bond issues. Tellingly also, 1MDB's detailed audited accounts are not posted at its website at http://www.1mdb.com.my/.

Consider that PKFZ was also audited by reputable audit firms; yet today our Government is staring at the possibility of a total bailout bill of RM12.4 billion, having already forked out RM4 billion to save blunders and crony and crooked dealings by UMNO and MCA at Ministerial and Cabinet level, and fraud at corporate level. 

Remember too that when the sub-prime and CDO crises hit the United States of America in 2008, necessitating a US$700 BILLION bailout of Wall St. and banks, the CEO's of Lehmann Brothers, Goldman Sachs, Morgan Stanley, Merril Lynch, AIG, Citibank, Fanny Mae and Freddy Mac etc, ALL, without fail, also claimed their accounts had been audited by the "Big Four" and filed in full compliance of all laws. But in USA Congressional and Senate hearings, evidence of massive fraud and financial mismanagement surfaced. All the CEOs had to offer, while lying blatantly with a poker face, is that they had been sincere in their dealings and decisions i.e. $700 billion dollars of it. If sincerity were gold, there would be another Klondike-like stampede among the "financial experts" in USA and Europe to trade and gamble on it, while blaming China if they lost money.

Here is another huge reason to worry about. Najib and 1MDB are courting the same "financial experts" in their clandestine wheelings and dealings. Thieves of a feather, surely flock together? And who is PM Najib most relying on - Goldman Sachs whose CEO Lloyd Blankfein, at the height of the USA CDO crisis, saw no conflict of interest in speedily short-selling the very shares he was urging his clients to buy at huge premiums!

And the sure kiss of death? Our PAC (Public Accounts Committee) pronounced that "1MDB acounts are healthy and in order". CLICK HERE. This is the PAC also under the chairmanship of Datuk Seri Azmi Khalid which determined that there was no hanky-panky in the RM8 billion Scorpene Submarine purchases contracts despite the gruesome murder of Mongolian Altantuya. CLICK HERE. The PAC also found nothing wrong in defence purchase of MIG fighter aircrafts totalling over $2 billion, where some $300 million of commissions were diverted by a procurement agent and ex-thief Minister of Melaka, to a fake off-shore company to deceive his partners!

The simple balance sheet facts about 1MDB are as follows:

1. Paid Up Capital - RM1 million
2. Total Bonds issued to-date - RM20 Billion
3. Total Investments and Cash/Profits - RM20 billion

From this, it is clear that:

1. The money that Petronas/Najib promised TIA, some RM2-4 billion a year, has not been paid into 1MDB's bank account. Where has it all disappeared to?  What on earth is Najib doing, allowing 1MDB to gear up at the rate of 20,000 times its paid up capital of RM1 million?

2. Why were all these bonds issued overseas? Surely, with 6% annual bond interest, Najib could have created a 1M Trust Sovereign Fund exclusively for Malaysians to invest in. Which Malaysian would not want to invest in such a fund, out of sheer patriotism? After all, not even the EPF pays 6% interest to its shareholders. More worryingly, Indonesia's central bank sold 10 and 30-year US$ denominated bonds 3 weeks ago with a yield of 3.5%. What on earth was 1MDB doing floating 6% bonds, and that at a discount of 20%?

3. Why raise funds in US$ overseas for ringgit denominated investments and development projects in Malaysia, such as the  RM26 billion TRX (Tun Razak Exchange) and the 196-hectare Bandar Malaysia mixed -development real estate development?

4. With bond interest averaging 6%, 1MDB will have to generate at the bare minimum, about RM1.2 billion a year to service debt. What is 1MDB's projected income and profit over the next 20 years, to justify debt vs minimum acceptable returns of 10% on its investments? IMDB's CEO is of course playing around with semantics by claiming it has no loans. A rose by any other name, smells the same. Call it bond or loans, it is ALL DEBT which is guaranteed 100% now by us, the Taxpayer.

5. By signing up with indecent haste the old and expiring IPP's, Najib has seemingly tied the hands of the incoming Pakatan Government (yes, I predict Pakatan will win GE 13 by a huge majority). With 55% electricity reserves, we do not need old or new IPP's. Since all IPP's require a guaranteed power purchasing contract with Tenaga to operate, once again Tenaga will be robbed blind to the tune of RM 15-20 billion a year purchasing electricity from IPP's it does not and will not need! But Najib, in his vindictive crony oriented endeavours, forgets that such transactions can be reversed if they are not in the public interest, fraud is proved or inducements (illegal commissions and bribes) paid to certain parties to bulldoze through the acquisitions.

6. Questions have also been posed to the CEO and Board of Directors of 1MDB if the off-shore incorporated PetroSaudi Corporation is the real McCoy, or as in the case of MIG fighter planes and ex-Thief Minister of Melaka, a fake entity created and headed by nominees, for the benefit of UMNO and its cronies.

7. It should worry everyone that among 1MDB's "advisors" is Nor Mohd Yakcop, now chief of the EPU (Economic Plundering Unit) under PM Najib's control. Nor Mohamed was the man who was sacked in the early '90's as chief forex trader of BNM (Bank Negara Malaysia) for creating losses said to be ranging anywhere from RM6 billion to RM30 billion!! With then PM Mahathir's connivance, the losses were originally illegally hidden in the accounts by netting off against revaluation surpluses from gold and other assets. The scandal only came to light when Lim Kit Siang of DAP (Democratic Action Party) astutely discovered the huge hole in BNM's balance sheet and forced Mahathir to admit the fiasco in Parliament. One may well ask what Nor Mohamed is doing back in Government, especially since no RCI (Royal Commission of Inquiry) has been held to determine if massive fraud was involved in a case which nearly wiped out all of Malaysia's reserves!!

8. We should nor forget how Sime Darby had to write-off over RM4 billion in its power & energy forays in Saudi and the Middle East. All the JV contracts were one-sided and drafted in Arabic which were badly translated, and proper due diligence was sacrificed to satisfy "more speed, less haste national service" calls by Badawi and Najib. Sime lost its case in the Saudi courts. Something like this is likely to surface if any of 1MDB's overseas investments in JV with PetroSaudi, Abu Dhabi or Qatar goes sour. Najib is bending so low in courting the Arabs as to shamelessly expose his total nakedness.

There are literally hundreds of questions that worried finanial analysts and Malaysians would like the answers to vis-a-vis 1MDB and its furtive operations. By stonewalling and hiding behind carefully worded PRspeak and civil service/civil serpent mentality waffle, 1MDB is not endearing itself to us. They can tell us (their 100% funders and owners) the truth, nicely and voluntarily, in a forthright manner, or be prepared to be dragged off in chains later (as soon as next month) and forcibly be made to talk! Are you with the Government of Thieves, or with the Rakyat? The choice is your, 1MDB!

Donplaypuks® with our RM20 billion, man!

08/04/2013

HINDRAF OR BLOODY HINDRANCE? IF THEY SIDE UMNO/BN, VOTE HINDRAF OUT!

by mahatma manu, Donplaypuks® intrepid correspondent for hindu affairs


HINDRAF or The Hindu Rights Action Force burst forth on the Malaysian political landscape in 2007 like a blazing comet from the Kuiper Belt. It dealt such a forceful blow to UMNO's (United Malay National Organisation) solar plexus as to knock the wind out of its lungs, body and sails completely, and  lay it flat out on the ground, paralysed for a few days.

UMNO never saw it coming. Malaysians never saw it coming. 

For once, some Malaysian Indians showed huge gutsy balls! 

Ground to dust by UMNO and the MIC (Malaysian Indian Congress) which was (correctly) seen as increasingly, if not already wholly, representing the personal financial interests of party leader Samy Velu and his cronies, HINDRAF rose majestically, to restore pride and dignity to the vast numbers of marginalised Malaysian Indians, who number some 2.2 million or 7%-8% out of a total population of 28 million.

The MIC and its leaders were (again correctly) perceived as spineless and consummate brown-tonguing and brown-nosing (read as UMNO arse-licking) artistes who had since1981 when Mahathir became Prime Minister, allowed, through sheer lack of cojones, UMNO to walk and trample over the rights of Malaysian Indians, like Serbians over Bosnian Muslims in 1995. What happened to Malaysian Indians between 1981 and 2007 in economic and social terms, was not quite a kind of ethnic cleansing or attempted genocide, as claimed by HINDRAF. Nevertheless, it smacked of carefully orchestrated acts of economic, educational and jobs deprivation, and religious and racial bigotry promoted by rogue leaders within UMNO. Illegally deploying taxpayer's money to fund government department BTN (Biro Tata Negara) courses to brainwash the minds of the mainly Malay-dominant (85%) civil service employees into embracing the Ketuanan (Lord of The Land) concept, and that the Malaysian Indians and Chinese were "pendatang" (immigrants), and by inference, inferior citizens not deserving of equal respect or treatment the Constitution notwithstanding, is as racist an agenda as the regimes of Hitler or Stalin had conceived and promoted.

UMNO was so shocked out of its skin that any Malaysian Indian would actually stand up for his human rights, that its pathetic leaders like PM Badawi ran around like chickens with their heads chopped off. Who the hell, UMNO leaders demanded to know, HINDRAF thought it was? Who the hell were these Malaysian Indians who had the temerity to organise and demonstrate peacefully against the "caring and fair" UMNO government? UMNO, like its former leader Mahathir, at once suffered from a (as is usual) bout of selective amnesia syndrome, forgetting that it was the police who, without an iota of provocation whatsoever, turned on on the pepper spray and tear gas apparatus.

The laws of public assembly had been breached with impunity, and at that, by, how dare they, good God, low class Indians? That law was of course, an ass, and completely ultra vires the right of peaceable assembly guaranteed in our Constitution. But do remember that we are living in the era of PM Grossemajib and Najibonomics, where UMNO thinks nothing of blowing $160 million ringgit to to dubious and shadowy foreign organizations like APCO and FBC, to spindoctor that black is white, and that we are 1Malaysia, but with 3 or 4 or any number of arbitrary systems that suits UMNO. This kind of wretched spindoctoring rhetoric goes back a good 60 years when the War Office was replaced by the Ministry of Defence, and the Department of Unemployment, by the Ministry of Labour, in the United Kingdom. UMNO/BN being an organisation of mindless copycats, has predictably followed suit.

UMNO lost huge face, publicly. UMNO's embarrassment and shame in handling and treating Malaysian Indians like second-class citizens was palpable. So, predictably too, mindless and Stalinistic-minded UMNO, Badawi and Najib retaliated with the draconian ISA (Internal Security Act) and Sedition Act to try and silence HINDRAF leaders. Hindraf was declated illegal. They succeeded partly, through physical and psychological intimidation, in breaking up HINDRAF and forcing one of its founder-leaders, Waythamooorthy, into self-exile in London.

HINDRAF had started off  protesting against bigoted action by state authorities, primarily Selangor state under Khir Toyo's regime, in tactlessly and wantonly bulldozing down century-old Hindu temples. Most of these temples had been legally built during the British colonial era, to cater to the needs of  Indians employed in the plantation sector. Egged on further by greedy brown envelope armed and rapacious property developers, UMNO controlled state governments paid short shrift to Indian and Hindu rights. UMNO/BN really paved the way for HINDRAF to rise, when they continued to ignore the plight of displaced Indian estate workers and, disproportionately high numbers in poverty, unemployment, criminals and the poorly educated from within the Indian community.

Mahathir's and UMNO's economic pie sharing out policy of 7 for us (Malay/Bumiputra), 2 for the Chinese and 1 for others (if they can find it) was designed and constructed in its practical implementation to virtually exclude the Indian community at large (Samy Velu and MIC ruthlessly commandeered it for themselves with impunity, as they saw fit). And when it turned out after some 25 years that the reality was 7 for the Chinese (by virtue of the Ali Baba fraudtrepreneur and direct-nego non-tendered out government contract procurement legalised thieving system), 2 for the Bumiputra (in practical terms, Malay) and 1 for the others (excluding Indians), the Malaysian Indian was doomed.

So, where exactly is Hindraf today, on the eve of our General Elections, with Waythamoorthy back home on his own terms, and Uthayakumar now heading the Human Rights Party of Malaysia (HRPM)? CLICK HERE and HERE. What are their strategies? Waytha and Uthaya think that the Indians hold the balance of power in many marginal electoral constituencies, and therefore, can become Kingmakers.

One must preface this with the observation that many who fight for human rights would like to think they are on par with Gandhi and Mandela, and would go so far as to embark on hunger strikes, to emulate their heroes and show their resolve and credentials. But, the times and circumstances are different, and Gandhi and Mandela were no mere intellectual giants. Personal integrity was their calling card.

So, what are we to think of Waytha and Uthaya who having seemingly snubbed PKR and Anwar, propose to enter the fray during General Elections 13, to secure their long list of demands to redress the economic injustice committed wilfully on the Malaysian Indian since 1981, by joining forces with UMNO, incumbent PM Najib and his Government of Thieves? 

Thieves in power who have over the last 32 years, allowed the siphoing out of over a TRILLION ringgit, through gross mismanagement and wilful acts of fraud, and concealed the money overseas in Swiss, Singapore, Channle Isles, Hong Kong, Mauritius, Maldives, the Bahamas and Panama bank accounts? Thieves, who have closed one eye to countless deaths in police custody and murder and failed to instruct the IGP to investigate and charge the person(s) who ordered the killing of Altantuya? Thieves who have amassed $40 billion in personal wealth while in office as Chief Ministers, and Chief Ministers who spend $500,000 on their daughters' weddings? And money mules who when caught with $40 million of tainted, corrupt money, are let of the hook, claiming it constituted legal donation? Thieves who deliberately over-price government-linked and guaranteed bonds, to allow cronies to fraudulently cream off $2 billion from the top, and then protect them by classifying the contracts under the OSA (Official Secrets Act) and BAFIA (Banking and Financial Institutions Act)? Thief Prime Ministers who sell IC's and citizenships for money to illegal Muslim Filipino, Pakistani and Indonesian immigrants in social re-engineering experiments and then blame others for it? Thief Ministers and Prime Ministers who spend billions of ringgit on submarines, aircrafts, ships and national defence and protection equipment, and then fail to detect an "incursion" of 300 fully armed Filipino Muslim Sulus whom the Thief Home Minster declares are "non-militant and non-terrorists". Is this the kind of government any sane person would willingly be identified or be associated with?

This is the thinking of intellectual dwarfs, not giants. When you sup and sleep with the devil, your soul is damned for an eternity. When you knowingly embrace thieves, looters, plunderers, racists, religious bigots and protectors of murderers, you become guilty of the greatest crimes by association. What exactly do Waytha and Uthya think Najib will deliver to the Malaysian Indian? At a time when the country's borrowings are at an all time high ($503 billion) Najib is giving away my and your money, and claiming he's giving away his and UMNO/BN's money. How much more deceitful can any Prime Minister be? It would be wise to remember that Mahathir promised Sq Qui heaven and earth before the 1999 general elections, and then completely reneged on it after securing victory, declaring that he would not deliver on Chinese "blackmailing" terms!

So, my advise to Hindraf is simple:

  1. Forget PKR IF you cannot come to an amicable compromise on a worthy partnership. But do not cut your nose to spite your face!
  2. Drop Najib and UMNO/BN like a hot potato, NOW! You do not want to become an accessory after the fact to a Government of Thieves and Protector of Murderers, which is the credo of the men and women now leading UMNO/BN.
  3. Contest GE 13 independently as the HRPM or as independent candidates. Then you will win our respect and votes.
  4. Like PKR and DAP, move away from religion and race-based politics. The writing is on the wall.
Otherwise, my advice to all Malaysians is to vote PKR or DAP, and consign Waytha and Uthaya to the dustbin of historical footnotes. Let Gandhi not turn in his grave or Mandela expire from a premature heart attack.

Waytha and Uthaya, we may have only this one opportunity to change this country for the better, for all. Don't blow it by allowing ego and false pride to cloud your minds and judgement over who you you will forge a political alliance with. 

Donplaypuks® with a Government of Thieves, man!

31/03/2013

YES, PRIME MINISTER! SHOCK, HORROR! YOU'D BE AMAZED AT WHO READS THE MSM & BLOGS!

UPDATED 2013 by hacker appleby bernard kerismudin, donplaypuks® intrepid correspondent for MSM and Blog affairs

OR, AN EARLY APRIL FOOL'S JOKE!



 yes, prime minister, who reads the papers?
video


EXTRACT FROM THE BRITISH BROADCASTING AGENCY (BBC) SERIES 'YES, PRIME MINISTER' - ‘CONFLICT OF INTEREST’ EPISODE:

PM Hacker: Don't tell me about the press. I know exactly who reads the papers:

The Daily Mirror is read by people who think they run the country.
The Guardian is read by people who think they ought to run the country.
The Times is read by people who actually do run the country.
The Daily Mail is read by the wives of the people who run the country.
The Financial Times is read by people who own the country.
The Morning Star (communist) is read by people who think the country ought to be run by another country; and The Daily Telegraph is read by people who think it is.

Sir Humphrey (Cabinet Secretary): Prime Minister, what about the people who read The Sun?
Bernard (PM's PA): Sun readers don't care who runs the country, as long as she's got big tits


We can gauge Malaysian readers by the same token:


MSM READERS

Utusan is read by people who think they have a God given right to run the country and be sued successfully for defamation and slander, forever and a day.

Sin Chew is read by people who think they ought to run the country.

NST is read by people who actually do run the country.

STAR is read by people who wish Penang and Lim Guan Eng ran the country.

The Borneo Post is read by people who wish the Penan and Bruno Manser ran the country. But after Mahathir's 'Buy 1, Free 1 IC/Citizenships Fraud' and the RCI, they now realise it's actually the Filipinos, Indons, Pakistanis and Banglas who ru(i)n their country!

Sarawak Tribune is read by people who think the Brown Rajahputras/Umnoputras from West Malaysia who will brook no opposition, run the country.

Tatler is read by the wives of the people who run the country.

Business Times is read by the people who actually own the country, while (Soros-linked/owned?) upstart KiniBiz at http://gsoroskubangpasu.com.israel is read by those who hope they will be allowed to run the country by repeatedly asking the same 22 questions.

Nanyang Siang Pau is read by people who think the country ought to be run by Singapore and/or China, Berita Harian thinks it is, while the Nesan thinks it ought to be Tamil Nadu and/or India!

Harakah is read by people who think God and Saudi Arabia should run the country from Mecca.

Sun is read by people who think the country ought to be run by Citizen Nades with advertising revenue and no taxes.

The Selangor Times is read by people who think Klang Valley residents constitute the entire country and run it.

The Sulu Liberation Front Times at https://www.lahaddatusemporna_kiramclan.agbimudin@suluk. con.skunk is read by those armed but non-militant and non-terrorist men who want to run another country.

What about the people who read The Mail? Mail readers don't care who runs the country, as long as he or she's got big fondleable tits and is allegedly involved in a sex or financial scandal involving DSAI, Opposition party members, Tim Rais Lloyd Webber, Screwties Commission CEO Czarina Anwar Ibrahim or about a lawsuit filed by the New State Parsley Sage Rosemary Thighmes dishrag against them. Lol!


BLOG & ONLINE NEWS PORTAL READERS

1M100mApco(not Israel), the personal website of the Grossemajibs at http://www.1M(not Israel).flomflopflocublogspot.com.portdickson./ is read by bots and decepticons who consume oily roti jala, will grease your back or palms as you desire if you oil their motors, and are planning for the (you hap me, I hap you) Transformers to run the country.

1 Malaysia at http://www.1malaysia.com.my/ is vaguely read by RAHMAN, Jho T Low and other low life who scoop vaguely with both hands from the 1Malaysian gravy train, and who think that USA investment firms and gurus from 1MorganMcKinzieWhoretonSucksApcoisraelFBCTrevinoLynch run the country. (But, 1Muhy thinks, first 1Malays, then 1Muslims, then 1(pu)Kimmas, 1Filipinos, 1Indons, 1Banglas and IPakistanis run the country, and that 1Chinese, 1Indians and other 1Pendatangs can take a long walk off a short pier or the slow boat to China, India or Taiwan).

Anilnetto.com at http://anilnetto.com/ is read by people who wish trams, funicular railway and ferries from Penang ran the country.

Another Brick (or is it Prick?) in The Wall at http://anotherbrickinwall.blogspot.com/ is read by people who think Pink Floyd runs the country, rock on and fcuking**!!## get lost if you fcuking don't agree!

ARTiculations at http://art-harun.blogspot.com/ is read by well articulated navel gazers and very private individuals who wish the Bar Council and lawyers (sharks) ran the country.

Barking Magpie at http://www.barkingmagpie.blogspot.com/ is read by people who think closet civil servants run the country.

Bersih at http://www.bersih.org/ is read, according to the IGP and Home Minister Kerismudin, by urban communists and dangerous yellow t-shirt wearing lesbians and LGBT "armed to the eyeteeth with ICBM paper pamphlets" terrorists and militants heading north towards Penang hoping to run into and wage war on the way with the King who is in the south in Putrajaya, and who think the Election Commission runs the country.

BigCat at http://bigcatrambleon.blogspot.com/ is read by Tinsel the purrfect cat who ran away from the tree because it was afraid of the (big dog's) bark! Now it paw-sitively wants to run the country by invoking special position rights and constitutional claws. Meow! Meow! That would be cat-astrophic and cat-aclysmic, isn't it! 

Big Dog's 'The 13 Million Plus Ringgit Guy' at http://bigdogdotcom.wordpress.com/ is read by those who will immediately issue you a red card if you don’t agree with their thinking on how to run the country, and who also think that panas, kunyit, gempar, the fraternity of the overly obese and Dr. Mahathir Mohamad ought to run the country.

Can of Book Worms at http://interlockgridlock.blogspot.dbahasa is read by those who think pariahs and "chinamen" who will sell their daughters into slavery and prostitution run the country.

Dean Johns Ad Lib at http://deanjohns.wordpress.com/ is read by those who believe in Cato's "Carthage must be destroyed", and likewise, the evil BUMNO/BN 1, 2 and 3, because any group of honest people with good intentions, political savvy and fair experience can run the country.

Demi Negara at http://deminegara.blogspot.com/  is read by people who think pendatangs are trying to run the country.

Din Merican: The Malaysian DJ Blogger at http://dinmerican.wordpress.com/ is read by people who don’t care who runs the country as long as there's jazz music.

Dr. Mahathir Mohamad at http://chedet.co.cc/chedetblog/ is read by people who think ‘apanama I forget’ self-appointed benevolent dictators who issue free IC's and citizenships to Muslim Filipinos, Pakistanis and Indons, should still run the country, by arbitrarily re-introducing the arbitrary no-trial Internal Security Act (ISA), arbitrary Printing Presses and Publishing Act (PPPA) and arbitrary Restrictive Residence & Banishment Act (RRBA).

English For All at http://misedumindopeydin.blogspot.gov.con.pjaya is read by no one who wants to run the country.

Free Malaysia Today (FMT) at http://www.freemalaysiatoday.com/ is read by free and independent citizens wo are not sure there is a country to be run, from where did you say?

Helen Ang at http://helenang.wordpress.com/ is read by those who once thought the Consumer Price Index of Asia (CPI Asia) ran the country, but who would now vote for Uthayakumar (of Human Rights Party) to run it. Curious? Ask her!

Hindraf @?? is read by those who think Tamil estate workers and Makkal Sakthi should run the country from London or Petaling Estate, guided by Ghandhian and Hindu principles, or by going on hunger strikes!

House PK (Parpukari) at http://www.parpukari.blogspot.com/ is read by people who think that panas, kunyit, gempar, the fraternity of the overly obese and Dr. Mahathir Mohamad ought to run the country.

Human Rights Party at http://www.humanrightspartymalaysia.com/ is read by those who wish Ghandhi and/or Mandela could run the country.

Ktemoc Konsiders at http://ktemoc.blogspot.com/ is read by people who think Wakaka runs the country.

Lim Kit Siang at Malaysia at http://blog.limkitsiang.com/ is read by people who think Singapore and/or China ought to run the country and Jebat Must Die at http://jebatmustdie.wordpress.com/ by people who think it oreddy is.

Magick River at http://www.magickriver.org/ is read by people like the Temuan who originally owned and ran the country via portals to other worlds.

Malaysia Chronicles at http://malaysia-chronicle.com/ is read by those who think Tian Chua, as claimed by RPK who was reliably not told so, runs the country.

Malaysian Insider at http://www.themalaysianinsider.com/ is read by people who wish their once 4th floor boys, "oxford merchant bankers" and newspaper editors ran the country.
  
Malaysiakini at http://www.malaysiakini.com/ is read, according to Mahathir, by communists and zionist sympathisers, who want George Soros to run the country by asking everyone to pay subscriptions.

Malaysia Today at http://www.malaysia-today.net/ is read by people who were reliably told RPK runs the country from the back of the Clapham double-decker bus in London, or perhaps from Sydney, Melbourne, Manchester, Peace Hill, AG Ganesh Patel's Office or a yacht off the coast of Thailand.

Masterwordsmith-unplugged at http://masterwordsmith-unplugged.blogspot.com/ is read by those who think Monday, Wednesday, Friday and Rainy Morning jokes keeps the country running.

Niamah at http://www.niamah.com/ is read by those who enjoy swearing at the country and run it from seafood restaurants.

Nikolas Aziz at http://www.whitejangutturbans.blogspot.syurga/ is read by those who want an aye for an aye muslim democrats to run the country, from under a tree.

No Under Table at  http://www.pmazalamtt4tbhstrangleyourself.blogspot.irp.agganeshpatel.gulagrussia is read by those who run the country from the 5th and 15th floor.

One Armed Swordsmanship & Beer Drinking At The Same Time at http://kriswaveanchorbeer.blogspot.com/ is read by those who think Kerismudin will be the next UMNO chief to run the country into the ground, with the help of armed-to-the-eyeteeth muslim Filipinos, Indon, Pakistanis , Banglas and southern Thais who are neither militants nor terrorists.
  
OutSyed The Mahathir Jock Box at http://syedsoutsidethebox.blogspot.com/ is read by those who are too busy running down other countries like India, worship Mahathir to a fault notwithstanding capital flight of $230 billion, and predict that the Beardo Weirdo Mullahs and Talibans who don't read the Quran, or China, will soon rule the country and the whole world, or hope Mahathir will come back and ru(i)n the country permanently.

Papa Gomo at http://www.papagomo.com/ is read by those who think sex videos manufactured backdoor in Thailand and starring Thai porn stars as Anwar and his family members including his grandmother, should rule the cuntry!

Perkasa at http://pribumiperkasa.blogspot.com/ is read by frogs who suffer from the delusion that they are the lords of the land at the bottom of the well, that discriminatory affirmative action in favour of the majority should continue for another 999 years, or more, and they need permission from "my home office ministeress" to run the country. 

Personal Protection & Horse Head at  http://www.corleoneahlongenterprise.irp.agganeshpatel.blogspot.sicily is read by those who think the Mafia and Triads run the country. 

Rantings by MM (Marina Mahathir) at http://rantingsbymm.blogspot.com/ is read by NGO’s and the wives of the people who run the country.

Ridhuan Tee at http://ridhuant.blogspot.com/ is read by those who believe that by changing one's religion, one can also change one's DNA and that those who are yellow outside but purportedly spiritually brown inside, run the country.

rights2write at http://rights2write.wordpress.com/ is ready by people who think those who are stuck with investments in now abandoned housing projects, run the country, and that they should vote into government only the party that revives these abandoned projects.

Roar of the Lion King by Karpal Singh at http://singhisking.guinessstoutblogsspot.goldentemple.amritsar.punjab/ is read by people who think turbanators ought to run the country.

Sacred Temples at http://bovinecranium.blogspot.com.shah alam/ is read by people who think cows heads run the country .
  
Sakmongkol AK47at http://sakmongkol.blogspot.com/ is read by people who once thought UMNO ran 70% of the country and possibly, another 30%, but now think the the Oracle of Syed Putera is sure to take over from that dolt Najib, and ru(i)n(?) the country successfully.

(SatD) Pure Shiite at http://satdthinks.blogspot.com/ is read by those who think the King should run the country.

Save Malaysia, Stop Lynas at http://savemalaysia-stoplynas.blogspot.com/ is read by those who have a burning desire to get rid of rare earth plants, and think Lynas Corporation executives from Mt. Weld in Western Australia will ru(i)ns the country after 30 million Malaysians emigrate to Australia to escape poisonous and toxic acids and chemical waste and fall out from radioactive thorium and tailings from Gebeng.

Sighfool Soap Opera at http://www.noshittoday.blogspot.halffootballteam.pussyrawi/ is read by those who support the back four rear admirals from half a foofball team to run the country from PM Grossemajib's home. 

Sink Not Float For $8 billion at http://www.aminahtuyabaginda.blogspot.com.pardonmyfrench is read by those who think 2nd hand re-conditioned French submarines should run the country.

Steadyaku47 at http://steadyaku-steadyaku-husseinhamid.blogspot.com/ is read by people who want to run the country from Down Under, mate!

Straitjackets at http://isateresakoksinchew.blogspot.chubblocks.com.kamunting/ is read by people who want to lock up everyone who disagrees with them, for their own safety and good, to run the country.

Taj Mahal Mansions for $1 at http://www.mbtoyotamolars&trainedarchitects.blogspot.com.bukitkayuhitam/ is read by people who think railway gatekeepers and dentists run the country. 

The People's Parliament by Haris Ibrahim at http://harismibrahim.wordpress.com/ is read by those who curse Mamak Koya Kutty ran the country (into the ground), who now think any number of NGOs can run the country (into the ground) and will make sure ABU (Anything But UMNO) does not run the country (into the ground) ever again.

To Sleep, Perchance Dream, Abdullah B's 2nd blog at http://zzzzzzdunlopillow.blogspot.com.ripvanwinkleland is read by people who wish railway sleepers, corridors, sil and 4th floor boys ran the country. His first blog 'As I Wake Up' has been retired.

Tunku Aziz at http://lim guan eng my master hero.blogspot.com is read by those who expect gaji buta life tenure as Senators and think TI (Tunku I) should run the country. 

Unspinners at http://theunspinners.blogspot.com/ is read by those who think $100 million APCO and $8.2 million McKinsey, panas, kunyit, gempar, the fraternity of the overly obese and Dr. Mahathir Mohamad ought to run the country.

Uppercaise at http://uppercaise.wordpress.com/ is read by those who like old fashioned journalism and hacks, the selangor times, and who think the republic of san seriffe runs the country. an old joke.

Uthaya Sankar at http://uthayasb.blogspot.com/ is read by people conversant in Bahasa Malaysia, and by those and who think that by familiarising themselves with the the ancient Indian epic, the Mahabharatha, they will run the country better. 

Zorro-unmasked at http://zorro-zorro-unmasked.blogspot.com/ is read by those who wish Catherine Zeta Jones (in black leather boots and brandishing a whip) would run the country.

What about the people who read the humongously popular rocky3540mahathirisdictatorking at http://www.carlsbergbru.nurainimahathirblogspot.com.jalansudin/ ? or at http://www.rockybru.com.my/ . They don't care who runs the country, as long as he or she's got big fondleable tits, is allegedly involved in a sex or financial scandal involving DSAI, Opposition party members, Tim Rais Lloyd Webber, Musang Hitam, Screwities Commission CEO Czarina Anwar Ibrahim or about a lawsuit filed by the New State Parsley Sage Rosemary Thighmes dishrag against them. Lol!

And lastly, Donplaypuks® at http://donplaypuks.blogspot.com/ is read by people, both of them, who actually do own and run the country one lah, jom! Isn’t it, dontch you know machan? I wish mah. Shirley one. Lol!

Bros and brodettes, don't rush and file your defamation suits against me en masse. Heh, heh, heh! Satire, humour and laughter are good for the soul! Remember, laughter is still the best medicine. People at Electricity (next year the name will be changed to Fuckupshima Nuclear) Board , please take note.

Donplaypuks® with what you read, man!