$362/74 BILLION PINK AND GREEN ELEPHANTS IN THE LIVING ROOM!!

(click on pic for enlarged view)

or 'where did all that elephant poop come from?' 

by rambo keynes, donplaypuks® intrepid correspondents for e.con.comic affairs 

There is a World Cup game being played here by Rosemajib and No.1 Junior Mentor/Mental KPI Minister Roti Jala.

At the same time, the government's No.1 Senior Mentor/Mental KPI Minister, Going Tu Soon, has conveniently gone on "leave of abscence" to USA, possibly accompanied by the CEO of a certain plantation-based MNC which has just leaked a couple of billion $ in the oil soaked sands of Arabia and the tree-stripped gorges (destined to become like the sands of Arabia) of Bakun in Sarawak!!

It forebodes the somewhat long overdue departure from government of the No.1 Senior Mentor/Mental KPI Minister from a largely sinecure (sheikh-a-leg) position accommodated for him through the back door of prime ministerial largesse, after being booted out by the electorate at GE 2008. Now after Jala's coup de grace, the senior minister is left with ONLY two options - resignation and Hara Kiri (Seppuku) or Hara Kiri and then resignation. In Bolihland, all options are always on the table and all options and all permutations thereof are possible!! -

In good 'ol US of A CIA and army-speak it's called CYA or cover your ass strategy. Very often it results in real stragedy or egg in your face.

It involves employing David Copperfield-like legerdemain tricks of mind-blowing illusions, of quicker than the eye can see misdirections. Now you see it, now you don't, abracadabra and pulling white rabbits out of empty black top hat!!

But however you try, you can't pretend not to notice pink and green elephants right there in your living room, especially the ones blocking your view of the TV and live telecast of the World Cup Football Finals, can you? For God's sake, you can forgo sex for a month, but not the World Cup Football Finals!!??

So, you cry "wolf" where sheep abound and make stirring wild claims to stupefied kids about gigantic red herrings that got away in imaginary mountain lakes. Or you hint at dark Zionist and International Monetary Fund (IMF) conspiracies, oil running out or a whole nation going bankrupt by 2019. After all there's nothing like a little scaremongering to panic the people into peeing in their pants, is there? What great fun!!

Why, you might even engineer the odd sodomy trial to distract the masses.

Next you'd engage an Official Secrets Act (OSA) classified $77 million PR Spindoctor Outfit which is a past masters at obfuscation (read as, lies).

Because it's a battle for hearts and minds as well and you can't take an eye off the looming 2013 General Elections. And who was it who said "if you get them by the balls, the hearts and minds will naturally follow"?

Because there is this stupendous, gobsmacking $362 billion hole in the govern.., er no error, the Peoples' Balance Sheet and it just won't go away. Stubborn shit!

So, when is a govern..., er no, error, the Peoples' Transfer Payment a Subsidy?

Answer: When Rosemajib and Roti Jala insist upon it even when it is classified in the Government's Estimate of Operating Expenditure under Code 40000 - Transfer Payments, as so astutely tracked down by blogger-commenter- economics sleuth Wenger KJ of http://wengerkhairy.blogspot.com fame. Billions of $ of pachydermal poop you don't want to poke your nose into, you naughty immigrant and bumiputra traitors who want to re-colonise the majority! $362 billion of it!

NB
At one time before Maha Firaunism, the government's budget was called 'Government's Annual Estimate of Expenditure" because that's what it was as, expenditure, operating and development, usually exceeded income during an era of planned and unplanned growth.  But Maha Firaun felt this was misleading and dubbed it "Bajet Kerajaan" (Government's Budget) which is close to the Malay word 'Baja" or horse manure!! Well, sometimes I do take liberties. Wish it were billions of $ though.

Let's focus, ok and not be side-tracked by side issues?

Here are the facts:

1. Out of $74 billion which Rosemajib and Jala have cunningly re-classified as "SUBSIDY" only $31 billion for petrol, gas, electricity, sugar, flour, rice, fishery and infrastructure constitutes real subsidies.

2. This can be further broken down as ($ billion):
(a) petrol - 10
(b) gas/electricity - 13
(c) toll highways, railway and rural air rervices - 5
(d) sugar, flour, rice etc. - 3

3. The remaining $43 billion are transfer payments, the main beneficiaries of which were:
(a) debt servicing - 10
(b) pensions - 5
(c) MARA college and other Universities - 7
(d) dividends - 3
(e) sundry - 5
(f) KLIA - 1
(g) federal roads - 2
(h) human capital (wtf?) - 1
(g) Others - 9 (no analysis available)

I am not 100% sure of the analysis, but it looks about right from available official information.

Now here are some $362 billion questions:

1. Who's kidding whom?

Transfer payments are meant to be gifts; one off or short-term in nature. If they recur, then by right they should be accounted for and appropriately classified under the relevant headings in the Government's Operating Budget (Bajet/Baja/Horse manure).

2. Why is the Governmment burdening Tenaga with a 50% reserve margin to be fleeced to the tune of $13 billion a year by the IPP mafia? The IPP contracts are largely one sided take or pay deals with 100% cost increase and gas subsidised deals.

3. Why is the Govt, which owns some 83% of PLUS, not re-negotiating the toll highway concessions? Asas Serba has proposed to the Govt a $50 billion buy-out monopoly of ALL toll concessions INCLUSIVE OF guarantees of an immediate 20% across-the-board toll cut, an annual dividend of 7.5% plus no toll further toll increases till the  end of the concessions! If nothing else, this shows the high level of profiteering enjoyed by the toll highway mafiaso. The adipose (fat) layer is very, very thick indeed!

So, here's my free recommendation to the Government on how to save $ 100 billion over the next 5 years ($ 20 billion per year) to stop burdening the poor masses by prematurely removing subsidies that affect education, health and welfare payments:

1. re-negotiate ALL IPP agreements - projected annual savings $7 billion
2. re-negotiate all toll highway concessions - projected annual savings of $4 billion
3. tender out all Approved Permits (AP) for cars - projected annual income of $2 billion.
4. cut civil service costs by an intial 5 % and continue with running a lean, mean and efficient fighting machine - projected annual savings of $2 billion (civil service annual cost is said to be $42 billion)
5. re-negotiate all water monopolies - projected annual savings of at least $2 billion per year
6. Other cost cutting measures, especially in defence procurement and opex (cancel national service) - projected annual savings of $3 billion.

More than that, instead of continuing with directly negotiated contracts, the Govt should go for open tender plus share of profits on developing land banks at:

(a) Sg. Besi
(b) Sg. Buloh
(c) Jalan Duta (Matrade parcel)
(d) Cochrane Road

That should generate another piffling $10 or $20 Billion?

There is also an immediate savings of $8 billion if we shelve for good that strange DRB Hicom directly awarded contract for 231 'light manoeuvrable tanks' for "Afghan monitoring UN duty"??!! For fucks sake, what the hell should we be wasting our time in Afghanistan for when our kitty is going broke? Opposition DAP MP Tony Pua has already revealed that the cost per tank of $35 million seems a wee bit expensive compared to $4 million from USA and European sources!!??

And that's not all. There's more to milk from:

1. One off capital ($500 million at least) and then annual licence fee for  EPL/World and Other Cups and Games betting operators.

2. Open bidding for broadband/ 4G telco licences. India just concluded their exercise for 3G and the biddings of billions of $  were 100% above Govt expectations!!

3. There's also Khazanah's 60% share of S$90 billion KTM (Railway) land in Tj. Pagar, Singapore. That's a minimum $120 billion excluding development profits. Factored that in?

The list is virtually endless! Joy is life and joy is business! Open tenders, anyone?

And who is it who's been the presiding Govt for the last 53 years and conjured up this $362 billion national debt, huge subsidies and transfer payments?

UMNO? BN? Rosemajib? Jala? Wigs? Chua? Maha Firaun? Ibrahim Ali? Perkasa? Helloooooo? Anybody at home?

Bankruptcy by 2019? Not on my life!

donplaypuks® with our national debt, man!

AH HA! THE PLOT THICKENS - TIGER OF JELUTONG STALKS SAIFUL!!

by malaysia@soroskininsider.extra.gov.con, donplaypuks® intrepid correspondent for the law is an ass affairs

It would be an understatement to say that it was merely another interesting day at Court No.3 on the 5th floor in the Jalan Duta complex.

Put more succinctly, you could have blown me over with a feather!!

Many had, especially after RPK chose to deal with justice/injustice on his own terms from London, Manchester, Melbourne, Ular Bator, Mars, Jupiter or wherever, rubbished his earlier expose about Saiful having met up with one, Assistant Commissioner of Police (ACP) Rodwan, on 25th June 2008, a day prior to when Saiful alleges he had been involved in a non-consensual penetrative sodo mee scandal with DSAI.

Today, in a purple patch of insightful and non-consensual deeply penetrative cross-examination, the Tiger of Jelutong, Karpal Singh, lead counsel for DSAI, elicited some electrifying disclosures from Saiful that fully vindicated RPK whose uncanny gift and cult status for leaking closely held police investigative secrets were, if anything, raised to Olympian heights!!

Firstly, Saiful confirmed under sworn testimony from the stand that after dropping out from Telekom University, he solicited assistance from Dato Sri Najib Tun Razak (then Deputy Prime Minister) in January 2008 over the phone at his office in the form of a letter of recommendation for a Study Loan for an Aircraft Pilot's Course (in Kota Bahru) which required only an SPM qualification .

Next, he revealed he also visited Najib at his private residence in KL at about 8 p.m. on 24th June 2008. The meeting lasted some 20 minutes only. Present at that encounter were Saiful's liaison friend and Najib's special officer Khairil Anas Jusoh from whose residence they had driven to Najib's house, as well as one of Najib's security personnel.

Saiful then opened his heart to Najib who however DID NOT offer him any advice. Saiful was quite adamant about that!

As events unfolded that night, Najib apparently asked his aide for Inspector General of Police (IGP) Musa Hassan's handphone number and while being given it verbally, Saiful's sharp ears registered it and he keyed it into his handphone's memory because he felt the IGP may be another person to open up to about his "situation."

Saiful spotted the the DPM's wife, Rosemah only as he was leaving the house, though he did not say exactly which part of the house he spotted her at.

After he returned to Khairil's house and then home, he telephoned IGP Musa Hassan and engaged him in a one minute conversation before he was cut off by Musa who told him in no uncertain terms not to call him on his handphone. Saiful was left with the impression the IGP thought it was a crank call!!

Later on the same night of 24th June 2008, he received a call from ACP Rodwan and made for a rendezvous with  him at a room in Melia Hotel. Oddly, the only conversation they had was confirming an appointment to meet up the next afternoon, 25th of June 2008, at Concorde Hotel. But curioser and curioser, the Concorde Hotel rendezvous did not materialise and neither did ACP Rodwan call him nor did Saiful contact him again!!?

And now comes the whammer! 

Subsequent to the alleged sodo mee incident with DSAI on 26th June 2008, Saiful met up late night with one Rahimi Omar and four other persons in Rawang on 27th June 2008, thought he did not say what for, before heading for that surely fated Pusrawi Clinic for a medical examination on 28th June:

1. His Uncle Pet, Tuah bin Mohammad Ali with whom he shared rented living premises.
2. Khairil Anas Jusoh.
3. Datuk Mumtaz Begum Jaafar, a former M'sian athlete from the '70's and alleged by RPK to be a close friend and business associate of Rosemah.

PM Najib's wife Dato Seri Rosmah Mansor, Dato Khairil Anas Jusoh and Dato Mumtaz all sit on the Board of Directors of YAKEB (Yayasan Kebajikan Atlet Kebangsaan of which Rosmah is Chairman) or the National Foundation for the Welfare of Athletes, verifiable at :

http://www.yakeb.org.my/v2/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=49&Itemid=65

 AND

here comes the coup de grace, 

DrrrrrrrrrrrRummm (roll of drums) Tung Chang Chang (clash of cymbals):

4. YB recently appointed Senator Mohamed Ezam Nor, DSAI's former left hand man who left PKR in 2007 and surprise, surprise, joined UMNO on 28th May 2008!!!! There is a rumour floating about YB, great expectations and the Deputy Home Minister's post in a soon to be announced Cabinet Reshuffle! 

It was definitely not a day for those with pacemaker implanted hearts or angioplasty stent-lined arteries.

Did we get a thunderbolt about a conspiracy of sorts or what?

What will the cat bring in tomorrow?

donplaypuks®

ps

On Tuesday Saiful not only denied under cross-examination that a 'plastic object' had been inserted into his anus during sodo mee II as recorded by a burmese doctor at Pusrawi Clinic, he also accused the doctor of lying!!

But this is very interesting. Saiful (not Anwar or his associates) picked the Pusrawi Clinic randomly. Anwar Ibrahim and 99.99% of M'sia knew nothing about medical examinations or police report of sodo mee II until a few days later. So, why on earth would an unknown doctor of 25 year's service and experience who did not personally know Saiful or Anwar Ibrahim, lie about a confession from Saiful about a 'plastic object' in his anus?

Did Saiful feel he had been cornered over a crucial piece of evidence and was  trapped into lying about the doctor lying? Because, if the 'plastic object' turns out to be a condom, wherof then 3 day-old seminal fluids, sperm stains and samples??!!

AMINULRASYID AMZAH R.I.P. - THE AIR THAT WE BREATHE!!

In the end the tragic police shooting death of Aminulrasyid Amzah will not be about closure for his mother, sisters and brothers who must still be in a state of shock and disbelief.

Nor will it be really about making the police accountable, exercise due caution or use reasonable force when apprehending suspects or about the already much discredited and perhaps even reviled chief of police being overzealous in protecting and defending his men in blue. Or of the conduct of the police in branding a teenager whom they had just shot dead, a "criminal" despite the boy having no previous records of any run-ins with the law whatsoever! Nor of the Prime Minister belatedly calling for the police investigations to be "more open" while opportunists from both side of the divide jockey to garner maximum political mileage out of the corpse of a poor, poor prematurely 'wasted' lad who had his whole life ahead of him.

It will not even be about Aminul's 14 year-old friend who was with him in the car during the entire episode and who brought a lump to your throat as he appeared at prime time on national television to contradict almost everything the police said to justify their actions and the findings of their internal investigation.

It will be about the very air we breathe, the essence of life and death!

You will know what I mean if you yourself have or have had a teenager daughter or son. Mine are 15 going on 16 and 17 going on 18.

Teenage life is filled with imponderables and impenetrables that are the end of the universe if not resolved by yesterday and of millions upon millions of imagined and unimagined angst.  

Pimples! BO! Mum, is my nose too big that girls will not find me attractive? Dad, am I too short to put off boys? Dad, you know Amy has a boyfriend and her parents allow her to go on dates to a disco ALL BY herself, hmm, hmm, dad? Mum, ALL my friends have Nike jogging shoes, why can't I? Geeze, why is my father so old fashioned and whothehell's Englebert Humperdinck ? Jim Reeves, mum you can't be serious! Is he from this planet??? I can't believe dad hasn't heard of Paramore!!

Teenagers are fully capable of driving their parents up the wall and all too often they know it only too well. Mine will test my exasperation to the limit. They are experts in that teenage-speak that may have you inadvertently reaching for the shot-gun:

"How was school today?"
"Fine."

"How did you do in the geography test?"
"Ok."

"Why are your shoes muddy?"
"I dunnow!"

"Why C for maths?"
"Everyone else got a D!"

"Dad, I need a suit and vest."
"Why?"
"For the school charity dinner."
"What charity dinner?"
"I dunnow!"
"When?"
"Tomorrow!!"

But this is the same child you looked at in wonder and awe in his/her tub outside the delivery room when you wife had caesarian; the same child you'd rush home early from work to spend the evenings with before he/she dozed off at nine and who hero worshipped you, tried to imitate you shaving or stole mum's make up kit and painted her face!! Did you not hold back the tears when your baby brough her kindy crayon drawings and  said "Dada, you the big smiling whale, ha, ha!" Another time is was a big smiling bear and once even a dolphin!! You bought them their first tricycle and then bicycle, roller blades, Barbie doll and playhouse and went whitewater rafting in KK.

And if all that is allowed to be snuffed out in one second without you having a moment to say farewell, thank you, I love you, what are we humans?

This goes beyond race and religion and kampung and town. Nations are not built around mere individuals, officials, officers, Attorney Generals, Ministers and Prime Ministers but around the nucleus of families and children and grandparents and uncles and aunties who form communities. Chinese father understands Malay mother who understands Indian grandfather. All share the same worries, fears, concerns, anxieties, hopes and aspirations - for their children. 

There is a almighty issue of legacy here!

And if in the process of achieving a caring, united Nation, we have to weed out an officer or two, or a chief of police or two, or a judge or two, or a Minister or two, or a Govt or......then that's our God given duty.

That's our obligation to our children and the future.

I shall make the time available to go visit Aminul's family and let them know I care, that I share in and weep at their immeasurable loss.

Because I have a family and teenage children.

I know. I know. I know! It's important to me.

Because Aminulrasyid Amzah should not  have been shot dead, least of all for  a teenager's immature NON-VIOLENT indiscretions!!

donplaypuks® with our children, man!!