by lord beaverbrook goebbels cronkite, donplaypuks® intrepid correspondent for yarns and spinning affairs (with due acknowledgement and apologies to rod serling and leslie stevens).
You are travelling to another dimension, the fifth dimension. It is beyond that known to ordinary men and women. It is a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity. It is the middle ground between light and shadow, between science and superstition, and it lies between the pit of man's fears and the summit of his knowledge. This is the dimension whose door you unlock with the key of imagination. There is a signpost up ahead. Your ‘Next Stop’ is an area which we call....
THE TWILIGHT ZONE!
WELCOME!
There is nothing wrong with your radio, television set, pc/laptop monitor or fish ‘n chips wrap toilet paper. Do not attempt to adjust the sound, picture or lettering size. We are controlling publication and transmission. If we wish to make it louder, we will bring up the volume. If we wish to make it softer, we will tune it to a whisper. We will control the horizontal. We will control the vertical. And we will control the equipment and the angle of the dangle!
We can roll the image, make it flutter. We can change the focus to a soft blur or sharpen it to crystal clarity. And we will run endless unreal reality shows and P.Ramlee movie repeats ad nauseum and there is not a damn thing you can do about it.
We can make mountains out of molehills, a shrivelled up B-24 cup bra-size pancake into an in-your-face D-50 B52! And, the daily news shall always begin with ‘The Prime Minster said today.....’ and it shall always end with ‘The Prime Minister said today.....’
For the next 5 years, sit quietly and we will control all that you see, hear, watch, read, think and do. We repeat: there is nothing wrong with your any damn thing. You are about to participate in a great adventure. You are about to experience the awe and mystery which reaches from the deep and remote recesses of the inner mind to the furthest reaches of...
THE OUTER LIMITS!
NOW LISTEN UP AND REPEAT AFTER ME FROM MIDNIGHT TO MIDNIGHT!
Anwar Abraham (a Jew of indeterminate sex) hates Malays. Kit Carson Siang (from Brokeback Mountain) hates Malays. Kapak Singh (from Axeburyhead County) hates Malays. Guanobay Eng (from Batman’s cave, Cuba) hates Malays. All DAPPER members hate Malays. Nikolas Aziz (another Jew from Saud) hates Malays. All Chinese and Indians are pendatang (immigrants) and they all hate Malays!
Anwar Abraham (a Jew of indeterminate sex) hates Islam. Kit Carson Siang (from Brokeback Mountain) hates Islam. Kapak Singh (from Axeburyhead County) hates Islam. Guanobay Eng(from Batman’s cave, Cuba) hates Islam. All DAPPER members hate Islam. Nikolas Aziz (another Jew from Saud) hates Islam. All Chinese and Indians are pendatang (immigrants) and they all hate Islam!
Anwar Abraham (a Jew of indeterminate sex) is a traitor to the Malays and Malaysia. Kit Carson Siang (from Brokeback Mountain) is a traitor to the Malays and Malaysia. Kapak Singh(from Axeburyhead County) is a traitor to the Malays and Malaysia. Guanobay Eng (from Batman’s cave, Cuba) is a traitor to the Malays and Malaysia. Nikolas Aziz (another Jew from Saud) is a traitor to the Malays and Malaysia. All DAPPER members are traitors to the Malays and Malaysia. All Chinese and Indians are pendatang immigrants and they are traitors to the Malays and Malaysia!
Anwar Abraham (a Jew of indeterminate sex) sleeps with the Americans. The Americans sleep with the Jews. So, Anwar sleeps with the Jews. They all hate Malays, Malaysia and Islam!
Kit Carson Siang (from Brokeback Mountain) sleeps with Harry. Harry sleeps with Pap. So, Kit Carson Siang (from Brokeback Mountain) sleeps with Temasick. They all hate Malays, Malaysia and Islam!
Nikolas Aziz (another Jew from Saud) sleeps with Mat Tak Selamat. Mat Tak Selamat sleeps with terrorists in Temasick. Temasick Govt sleeps with Israel Govt. Ergo, cogito anarkissmyassmo, Nikolas Aziz (another Jew from Saud) sleeps with Temasick, Israel and Terrorists.
Kit Carson Siang (from Brokeback Mountain) is Capo Tutti Capo 08 (Chief of Mafia and Triads Chiefs). Guanobay Eng (from Batman’s cave, Cuba) is son of Capo Tutti Capo 08 (Chief of Mafia and Triad Chiefs). Kapak Singh (from Axeburyhead County) is Capo Sekolah Luca Brasi 08 (Chief of Mafia and o8 Triad School of Executionists & Exterminators).
Although we have been ruling for 50 years and gave away d contracts (billions), d bailouts (billions), d licences (billions) and d AP’s (billions) to cronies, Anwar Abraham (a jew of indeterminate sex), Kit, Kapak, Guano, Nikolas Aziz and DAPPERS are responsible for all child kidnapping, molestation, rape and murder cases.
As well as ALL OTHER looting, kidnapping, snatch thefts, robberies, rape, murder, fraud, smuggling, drug running, prostitution and massage parlours, white collar and organized, unorganized and disorganized crimes, million $ and billion $ frauds and corrupt acts, over 1,500 deaths in the custody of various authorities such as police, prisons and other detention centres, 2,ooo arrests under the Internal Security Act (ISA), incest and sodo mee!! Why? Because they hate Malays, Malaysia and Islam! Why? Because they are all pendatang (immigrants)! Why? Because WE say so!
We think only the TRUTH! We speak only the TRUTH! We want only the TRUTH!
If you question our Enforificers, our 14th Floor Ante-Corruption Association oficers who work under sudden suicidal conditions and pressures, and our Public Institutions, it is tantamount to questioning and Ultra Vires Malays, Royalty and Islam. We will sue you, but you may not sue us. We will question you, but you may not question us. We will insult you, but you may not insult us. And if you disobey us, we will make you watch endless repeats of P.R.......movies.......
We have control of the Waves! We have control of the Ether! We have control of the Microwave Control Towers and the Microwave Ovens! We have control of your THOUGHTS and MIND! We have the 128-Channel Remote Controls (although we only have 3 stations!). We have control of Control!
1 People, 1 Nation, 1 Malaysia!
donplaypuks® with my mind, man!
INSTANT ON-MIND POLL:
1. If you were to compare our leaders to great historical leaders, would you choose:
(a) Churchill
(b) Ghandhi
(c) Mandela
(d) Martin Luther King Jr.
(e) A belly dancing lawatan sambil belajar (study cum travel) junket in Morocco with side trip to Disneyland Anaheim in California with a $1.5 million allowance
OR
(f) Hitler
(g) Hirohito
(h) Stalin
(i) Mao
We subscribe to the concepts of free will and free speech. So, think hard and choose carefully AS INDICATED! Or else, we will take you swine in for interrogation at our 14th Floor Windows 2009 Visit Edition Facility, where we have the means to make you pork, er..., no,... talk! For your OWN SAFETY, DO NOT bring your leather belt, blazer, shoes or torn long white trousers when visiting us or call your fiance! Your handphone and car keys shall remain in our safe custody pending burial!
2. If you were asked to investigate a possible $2,400 fraud or a $2.4 billion fraud, would your priority be:
(a) $2,400
(b) $2.4 billion
(c) Angela Jolie
(d) Elton John
(e) David Bowie
(f) Chyna
(g) Belly dancing lawatan sambil belajar (study cum travel) junket in Morocco with side trip to Disneyland Anaheim in California with a $2.4 million allowance
3. If a crony offered you a $10 million loan cum donation, would you:
(a) ask for a cheque
(b) ask for all cash in gunny sacks or Samsonite briefcases
(c) issue a receipt
(d) deposit the cash in your personal bank account in Switzerland
(e) pay your outstanding $150,000 corporate jet hire charges
(f) go for a beach resort holiday in Port Kelang with a $4.3 billion allowance
(g) go on a belly dancing lawatan sambil belajar (study cum travel) junket to Morocco with side trip to Disneyland Anaheim in California with a $10 million allowance
(h) call MACC
All prompt buttons have been deliberately disabled. You only have to think your answer. We are everywhere! We know everything!
8 comments:
Dear DPP
Aiyo - this post is such a riot!!! I am so sorry for my late visit. Have not been well and not online as much. You should put a disclaimer at the top of the post - laugh at your own risk or something.
Thanks so much for sharing!!
warmest wishes
Anon
I'm so pleased you enjoyed it, but who are you?
Please send me an email at za@donplaypuks.com
dpp
A satire at its best. Butcha, somebody who doesn't understand simple English may interpret it differently and fry you alive on MSM (Main Stream Media - all owned by THEM).
Pak Zawi
Thanks for your observation.
You may be right. After all, if they can interpret 'Ultra Vires' to mean 'Insult', anything can happen! Big Bro, where are you now? Lol.
dpp
THIS RESPONSE WAS POSTED TO PARPUKARI...LETS SEE IF HE 'CARES' TO FEATURE AND .....WHACK?
Dei Parpu
Nampak nya awak tidak ada modal lagi untuk kempen di Permatang Pasir.
Sebab itu awak sudah jadi creative director dan buat kerja cut and paste untuk lanjutkan perjuangan yang belum selesai.
Tapi you punya cut and paste job itu tidak profesional lah.
Aku ada cadangan untuk awak, supaya awak boleh focus lagi dengan lebeh wajar tentang Permatang Pasir.
a. Rohaizat kata dia tidak ada bini kedua. Tapi ada orang tunjuk dia dengan satu lagi pompuan dan kemudian pulak dia mengaku dah kawin kali kedua. Ada orang kata - kawin kedua itu tak wajib diberitahu kepada isteri pertama?
Apa kata hadis? Dalam bulan puasa ini memang awak dapat banyak ilham. Boleh terangkan?
Macam ini, Rohaizat boleh lakukan sesuatu jenayah dan asalkan orang tak tahu, kira OK lah kalau dia cakap dia tidak bikin salah?
b. Pegawai Election Commission ada halau pekerja kerajaan yang datang ke kawasan pilihan raya kecil semasa mereka didapati di kempen BN. Ada seorang timbalan menteri (dalam you punya bahasa - dari 'kaum komunis, kaum makan babi, kaum kafir') juda didapati disitu!
Guna jentera kerajaan untuk tujuna politik BN sah ke?
c. Ada orang kata Rohaizat terima wang pendahuluan 10% untuk beli tanah dan hingga sekarang dia tidak mengambil apa apa tindakan sebagai peguam pembeli-pembeli tiu.
Dokumen dokumen bukti pun ditunjuk kepada orang awam.
Kenapa Rohaizat macam ini bro?
OK, ada tiga topik untuk awak bagi cerita cerita seronok. Guna lah your cut and paste job untuk hias cerita cerita awak.
Kita tunggu.
Ah, satu lagi...walau pun sekarang bulan puasa....you decide lah...nak guna perkatan kasar dan bahasa maki dan 'vulgar'.
After all, you love to do the 'unimaginable' as you are the master in this.
Last point - always start your title with NIZAR...This is your trademark. Do not forget!
YOUR LOVING FRIEND
DPP,
To respond to each one of your highly pertinent questions, the answer is:
Belly dancing lawatan sambil belajar (study cum travel) junket in Morocco with side trip to Disneyland Anaheim in California...
That's the only thing that makes sense in this country.
pls help to find TMP, pls, tks.
chill la wei
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