THE NEXT GOVERNMENT.

BARISAN RAKYAT SHALL FORM THE NEXT GOVERNMENT!

SOS

SOS
nation in distress

The World Anthem


WE ARE ALL OF 1 RACE, THE HUMAN RACE.


15/07/2011

WE ARE NOT AMUSED! ROYALLY SCREWED! THAT'S NOT CRICKET, WOT!

by shut the fcukup TAFKAPC (the artist formerly known as prince charles), Donplaypuks® intrepid correspondent for royals screwing affairs




Just a couple quick jokes. 

1.

Dolly Parton and Queen E die on the same day and meet St. Peter at the stairway to heaven. St.Peter tells them there's room for only one of them.

Dolly Parton rips off her blouse and shows her pectorals to St.Peter. 

"I've got the most perfect pair of breasts God ever made. I'm touched and shaped by divine hands. So, it should be me that's going to heaven.

Queen E whips out a bottle of Perrier, drinks half of it, empties the rest down the toilet and flushes it away.

St.Peter laughs and announces that Queen E gets to go to heaven, not Dolly Parton.

"What!" screams Dolly, "How's that fair?"

"Hello Dolly, I'm afraid a Royal Flush beats a Pair, no mater how good, any time, any day, hands down! Didn't you know that?" St. Peter declares.

2.

Queen Elizabeth, Bush & Rosemajib died & went straight to hell.

Queen Elizabeth said "I miss England. I want to call England and see how everybody is doing there. She called and talked for about 5 minutes, then she asked "Well, devil how much do I owe you????

The devil said "Five million dollars." She wrote him a cheque and went to sit back on her chair.

Bush was soooo jealous, he started screaming, "My turn! I wanna call the United States, I want to see how everybody is doing there too." He called and talked for about 2 minutes, then he asked "Well, devil how much do I owe you????

The devil said "Ten million dollars." With a smug look on his face, he wrote a cheque and went back to sit on his chair.

Rosemajib was even more jealous & started screaming, "I want to call too. I wanna talk to the ministers, to the deputy. I wanna talk to everybody from Bumno and Buntutsan in Malaysia."

He called and he talked for about twenty hours. He talked & talked & talked, then he asked "Well, devil how much do I owe you???? 

The devil said "Twenty dollars".
 
Rosemajib was stunned & said "Twenty dollars??? Only ??"

The devil said "Well, a call from one hell to another hell, it's local" 

Donplaypuks® with my yellow royal state visits, man!


6 comments:

Anonymous said...

" your highness, we hate YELLOW but you on purpose are wearing yellow to greet us ! wat lah you @#$%^&* !"

ros in blues !

Anonymous said...

hey, i see the 'Bersih' on her YELLOW
dress lah ...she is 'too-much' already !

son bin ali , are you blind ? do something lah , lu @#$%^&* !!

tochemat said...

Think this picture is more disrespect to the Queen than it is to Najib. It just shows how immature we are in our call for fair democracy. Fanatics taking any way necessary to make the other party look bad.

STEEST said...

Absolutely hilarious. :)

galadriel said...

Hello, this be galadriel. Nice to meet u the other day at Premis Bersih :P

And I know ur making a statement with this yellow background. But at least make sure that the writing font is not in such a clashing colour la. Black might work better than blue. Right now...sakit mata la bro.
might reduce your readership, this little detail.

Ghaf said...

RECKONING THE FAMILY FUED
 
The farther , mother and daughter love to spend time in their spaciously home built-in Jacuzzi at least once in a fortnight .

In the Jacuzzi , they are not allow to be totally naked . It is against the family rule if they do so . This Jacuzzi session is about the family being together and talk about the current issues and usually they will talk about their party activities of the day . At time , they will talk about things happen and stories of the previous days . More often , they will talk about their family matters . But today , the story is quite deferent in the Jacuzzi .

The named Anwar , the farther , began to tell about his air trip from Germany ,

" You know Zah , I had the opportunity to be at the cockpit with the pilot , you know , while we were flying over the Himalayas , I could see the sky was very clear and blue , it was just beautiful up there , you know and at that very moment I was really thinking of you Zah "

" Really ! Betul ke ni Bang ! are you really sure Bang ? The wife replied with her pursy face .

" of course lah Zah , I swear and I meant sincerely what I said " The husband solemnly answered .
" If you can swear then , and why can't you swear as requested before the Quran " Zah returned words to her husband . The wife continued , " I am tired Bang of defending you and I don't really believe what people said about you Bang , because I don't see it myself " .
" Why are you so upset and what are you talking about Zah ? " , he responded with a little cricking voice . " you know Zah if you mean that " , he continued with softer tone , " all you hear are defamations and I don't stand to swear because I do not do it , swear Zah " The husband trying to cool his wife .
" Do I look upset , of cause I look upset and I am very upset , I am upset because I saw the video tape , and IT IS YOU " The wife declared her frustration .
" It cannot be me , Zah , Johari tells that the tammy is not mine , my nose is dent , my hair is not styled crew cut , my breasts are not that floppy , and Johari says my bum is not like Jennifer Lopes's bum and I don't have that broad shoulders either " Anwar tried to convince his wife grieved and troubled .
" Nuar , you must be kidding , how in the hell Johari knows your physical feature well , you know how long we being married , I am your wife ! don't you know that I know you from top to tail , I know every spots marked on your body even with your holy robe on , do you know that ? the ways you did to that perempuan Sial , you also did it to me same same , oh God ! , I am lucky I don't do to you that ice cream act , I don't think I be abled to eat solid food again and I be ending up living on liquid food spooning through using straws .

The daughter who was all along keeping herself quite , suddenly voiced out , " Please you guys , stop bickering and I already lost my mode to be around you guys "

" By the way Mami , while you were arguing , I saw these jelly like Ameba floating , what is that Mami ? "

" Ahh ! Itu lah ! Bapak kau , baru KENTUT dalam air lah tuuuu " there was paused . " Patut lah Nurul dan betul lah tuuu , tadi Mami dengar bunyi kereta Bapak kau jam 4 tapi Tak nampak muka pon , Bapak kau tak naik atas pon , apa dia buat dalam bilik bawah tu lama lama ? entah lah "