The World Anthem




by don ah fatt cosa nostril, donplaypuks® intrepid correspondent for IMF and Word Bank affairs

(for example of ah long sevices check out "housewife: ah long played with my lingerie." click here )

(Click on pics for enlarged view).

ah long from bukit beruntong

ah long in action


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Fill in form (must). Vely simper one, mah:

Loan Amount You Wan (RM)...................
Full Name (like IC)
House address ( foto copy hand phone bill / electricity bill. got fence/alsatian dog/guard security?)
Job (gip last pay slip)
Malaysian IC / International Passport (foto copy)
Must gip 1 passport sai colour foto
Must gip 1 rai and 1 left thumb print

1. You live with (gip name/IC):
(a) Fadder/Mudder/bludder/sister
(b) Wife and chewdrens (gip wife office address, chewdren school, IC)
(c) Girlfren
(d) Man / Lady fren
(e) Boy fren
(f) Pet dog/cat/hamster/fish/pig

2. You have (gip detail):
(a) Bank Simpanan passbook
(b) ATM card
(c) Credit card
(d) Genting card

3. You have (gip detail):
(a) email
(b) Hand fone
(c) House fone
(d) Face Book

4. Reason Loan:
(a) Expan bizness
(b) Get married
(c) Deposik buy new house
(d) Deposik buy new car
(e) Setter mother/wife/chewdren medicur bill*1
(f) Setter plevious ah long loan (our balance transfer program)
(g) World Cup Football
(h) Buy 4D
(i) EPL
(j) Genting holiday
(k) Marina Bay Casinoresortopolis Singiapor holiday
(l) Sign up kung fu class*2
(m) KLSE casino investmen
(n) Setter credit card
(o) All above

*1 Have serious heart pobbum or serious medicur congdishen? DON apply!
*2 Signing up for kung fu class? DON apply!

5. What your all time favourite cinema filem:
(a) Godfather 1
(b) Predator 1
(c) Terminator 1
(d) All above

6. What your favourite scene from Godfather 1:
(a) Cut off horse head
(b) Shoot off Mo Green eyeballs
(c) Shoot Sonny Corleone dead with 200 bullets
(d) Poke Luca Brasi's ("sleep with the fish") back of hand with knife and strangle him
(e) Blow up Michael Corleone's car and wife
(f) Shoot off spaghetti and fettuccine
(g) All of above

7. Where can normali fine you after midnight:
(a) At home watching TV with fadder, mudder/wife/girlfren/boyfren/fren
(b) Bukit Bintang kalaoke
(c) Zouk / Beach disco
(d) Lolong Haji Taib
(e) Feng Thou techno music"ice" joint

8. Which our calling card you plefelence:
(a) Red paint
(b) Cow/dog/cat shit
(c) Pig's blood (muslim never mine, can send cow's head one)

9. You wan join our Frequent Borrower program?
(a) $1 interest, 1 poin.
(b) 10% off next loan interest
(c) 50% off medicur bills for prosthetics, broken bones and injuries at affiliated medicur clinics.
(d) Can redeem poins against current loan and new loan
(e) Join 'member get member' program for double poins.
(f) Can transfer poins to spouse and family borrowers.
(g) Can redeem poins at Las Vegas casino (our own slot machine, blacj jack and roulette casino in Jinjang, Cheras and Kepong) and KLSE casino.

10. How do you hear abourus:
(a) Ad on telephone pole
(b) Ad on junction traffic light
(c) Fren tell
(d) Ad on fren/relative forehead
(f) Smell of pig's blood from neighbour porch
(g) Smell of car burning in neighbour porch

I,...........(full name as per IC), IC No........(as per IC) of .........(house address) hereby certify that I am in good medical health, bad finan health and have read and understood all terms and conditions of my Ah Long From Bukit Beruntong Enterprise Loan Agreement, in particular:

"..highly beneficial and generous charity loan shall carry interest at xxx% per annum calculated on daily rest basis....interest rate for 1 month or shorter duration loan shall be at higher rates...late payment of loan shall attract additional hourly interest at xx% per day....all loan repayment shall be in prepayment or early settlement of loan dim sum....I am not a fren or relative of Michael Chong...".

(Borrower sign here)

(Borrower thumbprints here)

Managing Director

WARNING - False declaration your health can result in loss of health for relative/fren!
WARNING - Late payment interest/loan can result in loss of body part!
WARNING - Don try act funny run away without setter full loan, can happen loss of oxygen to brain one!

donplaypuks® with my loan repaymen, mah!

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by donplaypuks® at

Today marks the 114th anniversary of the greatest newspaper article of all time - 'J'accuse' - written and published on 13th January 1898 by Emile Zola. As my homage to Zola and J'accuse, I reprise below my earlier blog post of 9 July 2010.

Alongside and before 'J'accuse' stands the American Declaration of Independence of 4th July 1776 with its electrifying 'We hold these truths to be self-evident.' This proclamation must rank as a sacred formulation of the fundamental rights of every human being and represents the pinnacle of human intellect in freeing us from a kind of mental slavery that certain men can command and rule us at their whims and fancies as if by divine right.

This reprisal is timely as it comes in the wake of Anwar Ibrahim's acquittal from sodomy charges, heralding a new brighter dawn for the nation.

Meanwhile 'the Good Dr.M' continues to sow the seeds of dissent and disunity while continuing to support the regime of a lying Prime Minister who propels us closer to a totalitarian state as the last strategy for his Party to cling on to power. 

Note too that Dr.Mahathir presides as paid "adviser" to the fast sinking Proton Holdings which for the umpteenth time has entered into discussions for either take over by or collaboration deals with successful foreign automotive giants while at the same time championing dodgy, cosy deals with local "auto czars" and "top Proton management." 

Of course, he is also paid "adviser" to Petronas which has embarked on farming out "marginal oilfield exploration rights" worth $billions to private companies. And who should be the primary beneficiary of these "direct negotiation" ventures? - surprise! surprise! it's none other than a consortium in which Dr.M's son has a major stake. Can anyone tell us what exactly is a "marginal oil field" that Pertonas is forsaking exploration of while Mirzan Mahathir and his partners, which includes foreign parties, are willing to sink in their own capital of US$400 million?

Everywhere we look, our treasured GLC's, like MAS, are falling over like tenpins. After announcing humongous operating losses, they are being patched up together by the same management teams which proudly announced after the previous restructuring (costing the Taxpayer tens of $billions) that it was the best ever and they had seen the "light at the end of the tunnel" and "turned the corner" after "leaving no stone unturned" in their search for viable solutions.

Previously, Dr.M, as long-standing "adviser", claimed he hadn't a clue about the fiasco in Proton writing off $560 million of its disastrous investment in motor-cycle manufacturer MV Augusta and selling it off for Euro 1. Consequently, Mahathir's handpicked MD for Proton, Tengku Mahaleel, was sacked. Mahathir again pleased "Que?" When Najib engineered the retirement of Petronas CEO Tan Sri Hassan Merican in order to ease in his dubious crony Omar Mustapha Ong (of Ethos Consulting fame) on to the Board of Directors, again it would appear, if it can be believed, Dr.Mahathir was not consulted??!!

One can only suppose that Dr.Mahathir, now wiser when even longer in the tooth, is taking an ever closer interest in the manoeuvrings going on in Proton and Petronas, which in turn is bound to be the harbinger of more Taxpayer $billion bailouts and economic rape of our "safe deposit" petroleum resources.

So,let's learn to recognise Mahathirism whenever and wherever we encounter it, and extinguish it from the face of the earth. 

9th July 2010


The 112th anniversary of the publication of the most famous denouncement in the history of the world of a racist conspiracy quietly passed us by on 13th January. The French writer Emile Zola took on the might of the entire Government of France when he sounded that clarion call for justice in the L' Aurore newspaper in Paris on 13th January 1898.

'J’accuse’ or ‘I Accuse’ represents the triumph of human intellect, endeavour, strength and resolve over hopeless odds when faced with institutionalised government misbehaviour, thuggery and gangsterism.

I had recourse to ‘J’Accuse’ in an earlier blog in 2008 click here 

There are other epochal markers for human intellectual development like the 1776 ‘American Declaration of Independence’ with its doctrine of self- evident truths, that all men are created equal by their Creator with inalienable human rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness, and......especially that:

Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the GOVERNED”.

Were you not inspired by Lincoln’s ‘Gettysburg Address’?:

“Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent, a new nation, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal.

.... that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain - that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom— and that a government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.”

Or by Churchill’s war speeches as he stood alone against the onslaught of Hitler, The Third Reich, Gestapo, ‘blue eyed and blonde’ Aryan superiority racist Nazism hypothesis, Holocaust, Mussolini and Hirohito, fascism and an Axis of Evil:

“I would say to the House, as I said to those who have joined this Government: I have nothing to offer but blood, toil, sweat and tears......

....our policy is to wage war, by sea, land and air, with all our might and with all the strength that God can give us.....against a monstrous tyranny never surpassed in the dark, lamentable catalogue of human crime..... You ask, what is our aim? I can answer in one word: It is victory at all costs, victory in spite of all terror, victory, however long and hard the road may be.....

We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender, and even...armed and guarded....we would carry on the struggle, until, in God's good time, the New World, with all its power and might, steps forth to the rescue and the liberation of the old.”

Stirring words and actions such as these represent the uncanny arrival of the right men and women at the right time to lead, guide and inspire the world to safety. They feature prominently among the pinnacles of the advancement of human mind and ethics.


When I first watched the black and white movie versions of 'The Life of Emile Zola' and 'The Dreyfus Affair' on Malaysian TV, I must have been 17 or so. The anti-Semitic aspect of the Dreyfus saga did not register much with me then though that was the central reason for the victimisation of Dreyfus, seen as a pushover by dark and dangerous elements in the admiralty of the French Navy. Most of my classmates and schoolmates, including me, were politically ignorant and naive even at a time when the Vietnam War was raging so close to home and the 1969 race riots, pretty much restricted to Malays and Chinese in Selangor, Ipoh and Penang following the general elections, changed our world! Back then, Kuala Lumpur was part of Selangor; it became the first Federal Territory on 1st February 1974.

But if today, anyone here were to say he is ignorant of the Israeli-Palestine conflict or the USA-Iran/Afghan War when Malaysians have justifiably sponsored and boarded flotillas heading for Gaza, and unjustifiably spawned local bomb makers and regional terrorists, that would be the height of ignorance or hypocrisy!

So, as in 1957 and 1969, Malaysia is once again at a crossroads. Now, we are faced with a right wing organisation, an NGO which claims to represent an “oppressed MAJORITY”! Now, isn’t that a little odd, if not an awful lot, given they are celebrating the 40th anniversary of the New Economic Policy (NEP)? More than that, the last 40 years has seen the almost complete domination at every level of Government, the Civil Service, Army, Navy and Air Force, Police, Judiciary, the administrative and teaching corps at Government owned schools, colleges and universities and Government Linked Companies (GLC's) such as Petronas, Sime Darby, MAS, Maybank and sports organisations, scouts movement and many others, by one group of Malaysians over any other.

Yet, they would have us believe, this has created an unprecedented level of insecurity among the majority that seemingly defies analysis. The NEP was formulated in 1970 to address the charge that indigenous Bumiputra majority in Malaysia only owned some 2% of the economy and to rectify the imbalance therein through affirmative action policies. It was meant to be terminated 20 years later, but never was by ex-Prime Minister Dr.Mahathir Mohamad (1981-2003) who summarily claimed its objectives had not been fully realised yet, though he never disclosed any independent statistics to support his fiat.

Some fifteen years later, a leading and highly respected PhD holding analyst and researcher with government resigned his post when his statement that Bumiputras had achieved 45% control of the economy was hotly disputed by then Deputy Prime Minister, Tun Najib Razak (now Prime Minister). It appears that equity valuations are still stated at original cost and not market values!

After 40 years of NEP, our government claims that the originally loosely stated Bumiputra target of 30% share of economy languishes at just under 20% and that of the 40% of the population classified as ‘poor’ by international yardsticks, Bumiputras constitute the majority!!

Whose fault is all that? Who is responsible for the gross abuse of the NEP to the extent that it only benefited a relatively few cronies, politicians, insiders, the elite and well-connected businessmen and corporate raiders to the tune of billions of dollars, while the masses ate cake? Who's exclusively been holding the reins of power since 1957? Who takes ownership for the endemic corruption and billion dollar financial scandals, the economic looting and plunder that continue to rock and quake the country?

This has led to vociferous demands amid much public hand wringing, breast beating and self-flagellation, prominently backed by Dr.Mahathir that Bumiputras who perhaps constitute some 60% of the populace, should by some law of inverted logic control and share in 67% of the national cake! The NGO leader and his acolytes aver they have a right to speak up and demand actions based on their view of right and wrong, on any and all issues involving or affecting Bumiputra rights; that they have “wide and enormous” support from the “indigenous heartland’ (wherever that may be).

Many suspect Dr.Mahathir is the real brain-child and power behind this NGO whose public leader gained a parliamentary seat standing as a candidate under the banner of Malaysia’s opposition religious party, PAS, then defected and now operates as an independent MP. Apparently his friendly overtures to the ruling party were roundly and pointedly, ignored!

Accusations have also been hurled against the ruling party that it has outsourced its extremist right wing elements and leanings to Dr.Mahathir and this new kid on the block NGO, thus killing two birds with one stone - appearing to be a moderate multi-racial consensus party AND portraying itself as the only party capable of dealing with overt chauvinism and extremism.

The stance and line of attack taken by Dr.Mahathir and this NGO is very, very clear:

1. The Ruling Party is no longer capable of protecting Bumiputra rights.

2. NEP should continue indefinitely until they and only they say, “enough”.

3. Their demands are backed by ‘Special Position’ clauses enshrined in the Federal Constitution.

4. The award of citizenship to immigrant populations in 1957 was a deliberate act of sabotage by the departing colonial British administration. That this somehow created what is in reality a 2nd class citizenship and a “Social Contract” whereby these immigrant citizens, their children and the children of their children ad infinitum will not question their government, ever, even if the Flames of Valhalla were to engulf them.

5. "Others" should not question anything pertaining to the NEP, its cost or who bears it in what proportion even if there is blatant abuse of it. (This implies the NEP exists only to rectify the economic imbalance among one group of Malaysians and not all, through affirmative action policies which are not defined).

6. Demands by other Malaysian citizens as to their Constitutional rights is not quite cricket, as by virtue of the (iffy) “Social Contract” they are 2nd class citizens!

7. That Opposition political parties such as multi-racial Democratic Action Party (DAP) (unlike the major component parties of the ruling Barisan National (BN) where memberships are by race) are anti-Bumiputra, anti-Islam, anti-Federal Constitution and anti-Monarchy (anti-Sultans). That DAP’s malevolent, treacherous and treasonous "secret" master plan/agenda is for the Chinese to re-colonise Malaysia with help from Lee Kuan Yew and Singapore to eventually turn it into a vassal and protectorate slave state of China. The woodwork is crawling with foreign spies out to wreck our nation!

8. If not, multi-racial opposition Parti Keadilan Rakyat (PKR) or People's Justice Party, is anti-Monarchy, pro-Israel and Pro-Zionists. It will turn Malaysia into a Republic and the 51st state of the USA, which, being ruled by proxy by Israel (as revealed so swimmingly by none other than Dr.Mahathir), shall surely result in Malaysia eventually being controlled by the Jews and their Diaspora!


Now we can clearly see in all its glorious nakedness the intentions of Dr.Mahathir, the new NGO, the ruling party and its MSM in the incessant demonising of DAP, PKR and its leaders. Attack is the best form of defence and when in doubt, play the man, not the ball (my tribute to World Cup Football)! Nazi Joseph's Goebbels' "A big lie when repeated often enough eventually will be accepted as the truth” has become fashionable political strategy. Ooh, you are about to be re-colonised and made 2nd class citizens in your own land by the minority and their foreign imperialistic allies! Boo, beware, or else your children will only be fit to be gardeners, chauffeurs, taxi and bus drivers, office and messenger boys, coolies and keranis (clerks)!

That it should fall to a non-entity, the little guy, the nobody, the small time blogger to sound the nation and the world, raise the cudgel and hopefully strike a blow for reason, freedom, truth and justice to prevail is a little worrying. All these people whom I revere and whose names I have sprinkled about as though I can claim a right to be associated with them - Washington, Lincoln, Churchill and Zola, oh Emile Zola, I ask for their forgiveness.

I am once again drawn to the 1776 ‘American Declaration of Independence’:

“..That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organising its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness......

But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such government, and to provide new guards for their future security.”

And so let me begin:

J'Accuse Dr. Mahathir Mohamad of indulging and engaging in demagoguery, of playing to the gallery and playing with fire to drive a wedge and divide Malaysians, pitting race against race, by promoting envy and jealousy.

J'Accuse Dr. Mahathir Mohamad of scaremongering tactics, of and posturing like Enoch Powell who once scurrilously tried to frighten Britain citizens about being swamped by coloured immigrants and of “rivers of blood”! All this to mislead our people into thinking the ruling party is ordained (by divine right) to govern in perpetuity and there are no alternatives regardless of its excesses!

Let us be very clear. The majority of Bumiputras voting for the Opposition does not constitute loss of political power or control for the Bumiputras. It may be fatal for the incumbent ruling party, but that is not equivalent to a fate worse than death for the Bumiputras. No sirree, not by a long, long way! You see, you need the "consent of the GOVERNED". If you don't have it, you should know where the door is! The Governed today are not the uninformed naive lot that might once have been quietly bled to death by increasingly subtle ponzi and cunning Bernie Madhoff and Goldman Sachs mafia-style rabid conscienceless capitalist schemes!

J'Accuse Dr.Mahathir Mohamad of hypocrisy in ranting about a future government that MIGHT open the floodgates of immigration and reduce the Bumiputras to minorities in their own native land. There is also something quite amiss, something not quite right when Dr.Mahathir is himself actually the son of either 1st or 2nd generation immigrants from Kerala in India. Dr.Mahathir was the presiding prime minister when identity cards were issued by civil servants to illegal immigrants in Sabah attempting to re-engineer the population mix there. It was he who opened the doors to foreign labour and maids and then offered amnesty to a million illegal immigrant workers. Today, it is conservatively estimated that there are about a million illegal immigrants each in peninsular Malaysia, and Sarawak and Sabah.

J'Accuse Dr. Mahathir Mohamad of doing this deliberately and not caring a jot as to the consequences of such actions. In a tinder-dry atmosphere of his creation, when embraced by immature minds and opportunist politicians, such irresponsible utterances, writings and actions can prove to be the flash point for conflagration as in 1969! The highly intelligent Dr.Mahathir is not aware of it? Only too well, I suspect!

J'Accuse our successive governments of allowing the separate arms of a democratic state to deteriorate and be compromised as to their honesty and integrity to the greatest detriment of its people. Corruption and economic looting have been permitted to flourish and their perpetrators, to enjoy the fruits of their ill-begotten gains and escape scot-free!

J'Accuse our government of selective prosecution and double standards. Thus, an opposition MP is prosecuted under sedition laws for merely making a factually correct statement that a Sultan can be sued by law. Reporters and opposition politicians are bafflingly arrested and sequestered under the Internal Security Act (ISA) "for their own safety" based on unfounded rumours about an insult to Islam traceable to a blog posting by a ruling party MP and ex- State Chief Minister. Pro-government newspapers blow the conch for unreserved retaliation without verifying an iota of fact! A cartoonist, because his drawings are seen as anti-Government, has his books confiscated and banned under the repressive 1984 Printing Presses and Publication Act (PPPA) promulgated by Dr.Mahathir.

On the other hand, a government MP is let off with a slap on the wrist for referring to some citizens as immigrants, most of whom are 2nd and 3rd generation citizens or older! As too occurred with the prime minister defending his political aide who was forced to apologise and resign amidst public furore and outrage over a racist speech rant that the mothers of Chinese immigrants came to Malaysia as prostitutes to sell their bodies, and Indians as beggars! Really, PM Najib, do you honestly believe the words that came out of your own mouth that your ex-aide had not referred to “local Chinese and Indians”? He was referring to foreign Chinese and Indians who never set foot on our shores? Really? Then, my grandfather was a Caucasian named Ghandhi Mao!

And insulting foreign Chinese and Indians is acceptable behaviour? It is not blatant racism deserving outright condemnation and possibly, prison sentence for the "orator"?


You cling to power, fame, the dismal dregs, trappings and illusion of money, property, wealth and a place in the history books.

I am not judging expecting perfection from you. The Lord alone knows my own weaknesses and pathetic failures.

I demand fair play. I demand justice prevails. That’s all.

And I say all this with great fear. I am no hero. I “know” no one. If they come after me in the wee hours of the morning because that’s what they have learnt from Stalin and Hitler and Idi Amin, Bokassa, Saddam and the Taliban about how to treat their fellow citizens, I shall go quietly and gently in their Black Maria and say nothing. I shall not give the enforcers any statements or the time of the day. I shall not give in to pain!

I have said what I meant to.

My inalienable right to say it is indisputable.

I have the weight of history in my favour and (I hope) God on my side!

we are all of 1 race, the Human Race,
we shall all unite around that indisputable truth!
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by chichakman pontianak spielsramliburger, donplaypuks® intrepid correspondent for d movies and d arts affairs


The year is only six months gone. Yet the amount of material that has surfaced for books and movies has reached a phenomenal all-time world record high in 1Nation, 3 Systerns (systems + cisterns) Bolihland.

Here’s a slection of 5 stories that could easily be vieing for the little known DAMN (donplaypuks® Academy of Movie News) organization which was set up in 2009 to recognize excellence of professionals in the local film industry, including directors, actors, actresses and writers with an annual award of DAMN Oscars.

To recap on the DAMN Oscars, click click here

“The formal ceremony at which the 2011 DAMN Oscars awards will be presented shall be held at the open-air Gong Badak World Class Stadium in KT and televised globally. It is expected to be one of the most prominent award ceremonies in the world, attracting film stars, producers and glitterati from Hollywood, Bollywood, Kollywood and Honkytonkywood, overshadowing other international award ceremonies such as the Hollywood Oscars, Hammy (best ham actor), Emmy, Grammy (best grandmother story), Bafta, Tony (Tony Roma, best Steaks), Cannes (best tin cans), Bata (best school shoes), Buntutsan Awards (best bad- ass racist journo) and the like.”

A totally fictitious account of the world’s first $4 billion ($2.5b+30% ali baba+$540m+ 270m+$1.2b miss-iles+$1b rounding up) sampan class scorepenis submarine (retractable protoscoped periscope with DNA ID function and manufactured reports optional). It never sinks, but is nevertheless fully operational, armed with $1.2 million each guided exocet missiles to patrol our coasts to stop illegal Indon immigration and “wolves in the woods” from subverting national security!!


A totally fictional fairytale cartoon account of $50 million jet engines that can fly without a plane, and $200 million planes that can fly without engines and wings. Certified valid and ratified at Uruguay Round Talks on (extinct) GATT.  

Attorney General Ganesh Patel charges a 3rd class Indian airforce private and a private sector entrepreneur kachang puteh (peanut) seller with theft and treason.

The services of 15 Airforce generals and top brass are terminated at the same time without compensation, which AG Ganesh Patel clarifies is a totally isolated and unrelated incident.


A totally fictitious noir story of a $ 8 billion ($5b+30% ali baba+10% service charge+5%+$1b rounding up) contract awarded to a car AP (Approved Permit) pedlar for designing, manufacturing, testing and commissioning (+30%+10%+5%) state-of-theatre light armoured tanks for UN (UMNO New) sponsored Afgham monitoring (war games) missions.

$77 million paid spokesmen for Defence Minister Al Kayder Zawahri, reveal to a startled nation that there’s absolutely no rumour to the truth that defence forces had been infiltrated or national security compromised, by Al Qaeda terrorist spies.


Based on a childrens’ nursery rhyme, this cartoon fable is about a once crooked apanama acerbic great pharoah who walked a crooked mile. He found himself in a crooked dilemma and so gave a non-tendered/direct nego contract to a croney to build a $3 billion crooked bridge. The project was subsequently aborted with compensation of $700 million paid to the croney. Then they spent it all and so demanded as of birthright Version 2.0 of an even more crooked bridge at twice the crooked cost+30%+5%+10% excluding state royalty or $5 billion with VO's, whichever is the greater.

great pharoah dismisses criticisms that it's a thinly disguised monomaniacal attempt to reclaim lost land, lost waters and lost sand as a sovereign right and start World War 3 at any cost (+10%+1/3x60%+GST+full compensation rights for suspended works and War Tribunal Costs). 

“How could that be?” protesteths great pharoah, "Think carefully now. My ancestors are from Kerala, India. We believe in prosper thy neighbour (to bankruptcy) policies!”  


A betting man's heart wrenching, endlessly twisting made-for-Escot Satellite TV thriller fiction movie about the 20-year journey of a Kroney Korpo Rat Kepten Tycoon, Vincy Baby, who travels 20,000 leagues all over Ipoh and Perak and finally secures a free licence to print money for his Successful Group of public listed companies(SG Plc).
The government of the Rosemajibs, comprising below King & Queen status 1st lady de facto PM who wears the pants and her husband, approve in writing but not award, a state-of-the-art money printing machine licence in the form of a Letter of Intent (LOI) to SG Plc. The award is “certain but still under con-sideration”. The Korpo Rat Kepten, as a sign of corpulent social responsibility (CSR) pledges to “donate” $575 million (to himself) for worthy causes, to be disbursed by one Deepackemin Rosemah and her mustachioed husband, Mumtaz Taj Mahal Jahat!

Initial costings were brilliantly budgeted at $zero. But soon an ali baba roti chanai cum “global” rice trader, Said Ideal, “buys” 30% into the project planned to be housed in in a $400 million palatial building dubbed ‘Casino Royale.’ $400 milion +30%+30%+ road and flyover works to Monaco soars to over $800 million excluding pure gold for taps and faucets, cheap furniture from NY, London and Paris, Italan marble and World Class (WC) works of art!

Then the Rosemajibs reveal a surprise Govt audit had exposed  shockingly fraudulent accounting by SG plc and Said Ideal. The SC (Secured Crooks) invites several financial reporters and their lawyers for cold tea, cold turkey sandwiches and cold unbuttered and strawberried scones.

The Casino Royale LOI is duly "withdrawn under con-sideration??!!" SG Plc’s Kroney Korpo Rat Kepten and Said Ideal are last seen wandering around Pudu Jail and the banks of Bamboo River and Iron River!! 

The half completed Casino Royale palatial building is re-designated a UN (UMNO New) sanctioned cultural centre with a con-pletion budget of an additional measly $2 billion with unforeseeable VO add-ons. 

The movie ends with the memorable lines,"Frankly my dear, I don't give a DAMN, Oscars or not. After all it's not a karaoke joint or fuckshop for a Chinese contractor is it??!! We deserve World Class (WC) Arab-domed ones, don't we?" from the perennially foot-in-mouth disease suffering Minister for The Arts, Culture, Media and Law, Tim Rice Anak Yatim Nazi!!

Do write in with your own movie suggestions for the 2011 DAMN Oscars!

donplaypuks® with our movies, man!