The World Anthem




by ghida charlie fakhry rose, Donplaypuks® intrepid correspondent for vague interview affairs

The WCW Toilet Stars and Stripes Daily, voted (by journalists) as journalistically most disgraceful newspaper ever in the history of the civilized world, second only to the Buntutsan Daily and the New State Parsley, Sage, Rosemary and Thymes Daily, managed to track down the lately elusive 1M Israel Royal Flip Flop Fcuk Up PM of Malaysia, Mrs. Rosemajib, and her husband, Mr. Birkin FLOM (First Lady of Mongolia), for an exclusive interview conducted somewhere in this universe, possibly even a parallel universe "where the truth is out there" and "beyond infinity."

Here are some excerpts of that interview classified under the the dreaded OSIBISA (Official Secrets, Intelligence, Banking and Internal Security Act):

WCW: (grovelling) Nice handbag! Your majesty Rosemajib, we, your loyal subjects, have heard through the Mossad grapewine that your 1M Israel concept and policies have turned out to be a phenomenal suckcess. Can you confirm it? Reveal the stats?
Rosemajib: Ssh! Not so loud. It's classified 'Top, Top Secret' under OSIBISA, you dontch know? Tak kan KITA pecah perkara2 rahsia?
WCW: Well, then, at least can you recap the details of the 1M Israel policy and concept?
Rosemajib: Tak kan, .....betther not. We deliberately left it a little hazy, somewhat vague, so that it could be all-inclusive and all-exclusive, and partly inclusive and partly exclusive, all at the same time, while having the flexibility to be strategically ambiguous, so that if anything goes wrong, we can blame it on the Communists, Americans, Singaporeans, Zionist conspirators, George Soros, Ibrahim Ali and the Mamak Gang.
WCW: Brilliant! Could you repeat that? 
Rosemajib: Basically, it is government policy to talk in mistysteamspeak. The people may not see my 1M Israel woolly concept as practised within the entire government system. But then again, people must realise that this is a journey.
WCW: Journey to where, your grace?
Rosemajib:  Infinity and Beyonce, and Lady Gaga of course! In the past, people thalked about working together, but there was no real operational definition of what that meant. In the future, the staus quo will remain the same. See, no sudden changes.
WCW: Wow! I never saw it that way, your eminence! Being vague is in vogue! Just testing, your Lordship, can you recall Altantuya Aminah?
Rosemajib: Here and there, in bits and pieces.
WCW: $540 million "not a commission, but a facilitation fee" R Baginda, PhD?
Rosemajib: That Oxfam case? Couldn't keep a zip on his loose Scorepenis stub Sub, could he?
WCW: Totally non-corrupt $92 million foreign direct investment bribe to BUMNO totally not related to timber contract kickbacks to a certain East M'sia Chief Minister?
Rosemajib: Bribery donations to NGO's are perfectly normal and legal. Ask SUARAM.
WCW: The $76 million diamond ring from Jacob's Buscuits of NY said to be for Birkin FLOM?
Rosemajib: Diamonds are forever and for everyone. We accept all donations.
WCW: Deepak and PI Bala?
Rosemajib: Ssh! Statutory Declarations?
WCW: Why did you not appear in Parliament to answer questions from MP's regarding your 2013 Budget presented by you, especially since, besides your salary as PM, you also draw additional allowance of $30,000 per month as Finance Minister? Why did you chicken out? Afraid of Anwar Ibrahim and his questions?
Rosemajib: Watch it! I admit I was not tear gassed at Bersih 3 while hiding in the bunkers at Suckcesspool Prince City, but kita pun perasaan! But I am betther Finan Ministher than Anwar. Ask Roti Jala and Nor Mohd Robocop. I hap them, they hap me. Anwar never hap me. No 'nambikei' in me!

And so it continued for several days as WCW forged ahead bravely with his vaguely penetrating groundbreaking and earth shattering flatulence, while Rosemajib delivered an Oscar-winning performance in his transparent vagueness!

Donplaypuks® with nonsensical obscurity, man!



by inspector loh and behold, Donplaypuks® intrepid correspondent for stinking, lying grand auto theft cover up affairs

Truth, like cream, will eventually rise to the surface, when we are persistent enough in getting to the bottom of any issue. Just about everyone and his uncle Bob knew way back in 2009 that a travesty of justice was about to unfold in the Kugan "sudden death" case at a police station lock up at USJ 10 Taipan, Subang Jayawhich was originally classified as a murder case by the Attorney General!

CLICK ON LINK for my April 2009 expose on that farce.
To recap, Kugan had been arrested for his apparent involvement in an 'international auto theft ring." He had no previous criminal record of any kind and subsequently, the police never produced a shred of evidence to justify arresting him. Nonetheless after several hours of intensive interrogation, Kugan's body was "discovered" lifeless in a holding cell at the police station. It transpired that Kugan had been subjected to a gruelling 24-hour interrogation session by 11 police officers, all of whom were transferred to other jurisdictions shortly after the debacle.

The over-zealousness with which the police officers approached their job indicates they must obviously have laboured under the perception that Kugan's "crimes" were undermining PM Najib's grandiose $Trillion Economic Transformation Project and the economy, more than the PKFZ $12 billion fraud/fiasco or the C4 explosives murder case of Mongolian Altantuya Aminah, and related government/navy procurement of two Scorpene submarines costing some $7.6 billion, and payment of $540 million "facilitation fees" to one, Razak Baginda who had a (confessed to in open court) sexual bigamous affair with Altantuya. One shudders of course at the spate of unsolved murders, rapes and serious crimest that have been "solved", according to a high-up ex-cop, by re-classifying them under new policespeak "non-serious" crime.

Kugan's death came into public focus when the first post mortem conducted by a government doctor was rendered worthless by a second one, undertaken at his family's behest, that revealed he had some 45 serious injuries, scars and bruises on his body. It was clear he died by being brutally beaten up while in police custody.

Recent reports of the testimonies given by police officers at the ongoing $100 million civil suit brought by Kugan's family against the police and government, are startling to say the least. More than that, they are frightening. There can be little doubt rogue elements in the higher echelons of the police force have turned it into a Stalinistic KGB-style Gulag Archipelago! Here are some of the revelations:

1. The lone cop who was charged with causing grievous hurt to Kugan, V. Navindran, who was sentenced to serve two 3-year jail terms concurrently,, has now sang on the stand that it was all a cover up instituted by his ex-CPO (now deceased). Was Nivindran paid to agree to be the fall guy?

2. This was further confirmed by his his ex-Supervisor, Loh Voon Chye (now attached to Subang Jaya Criminal Investigations Department). Quote: "All I know is that Kugan's death at 11.48am on Jan 20 was not during Navindran's watch as he (Navindran) was supposed to start work at noon," Loh said.Unquote.

3. What is also incredible is that Loh claimed he had not noticed the 45 injuries on Kugan's body, which was echoed also by Investigating officer of that case Inspector Faezal Monir!

Here are more links to reports on the ongoing civil trial: 

 Google 'Kugan' and 'Navindran' and you'll have access to the unfolding sordid drama. You read and make up your mind.

What is clear though is that a MASSIVE cover up by the police has taken place. Truth, justice and our courts have been stood on their heads. Why? Because Kugan was a nobody office boy, while 11 police officers just HAD to be protected because some suffer from a kind of Ketuanan complex?

This is precisely why the UMNO/BN government has to go for good at GE 13. The can be no revamp of our police force without political will and action. That Najib has failed in reining in the cops is palpably obvious. He fears them more than the citizens, and not without good reason too!

Donplaypuks® with murder and cover ups, man!



Tiger Isle Review at Malaysiakini

Tiger Isle Purchasing Info Link


Welcome to Tiger Isle, or Pulipore, population 30 million, found in South-East Asia (SEA) between north of Sumatra and west of peninsula Malaysia, tag-lined "Corruption capital of the world".

In his debut novel "Tiger Isle: A Government of Thieves", author ES Shankar has created an imaginary, fictitious country which "mysteriously emerged from the depth of the waters of South-East Asia in 200BC, spirals towards the tipping point of 2012".

In it are 322 pages of gruelling plots and events which resemble a country we know. Shankar leaves many clues that may lead a reader to conclude “This is Malaysia!”, when depicting how Rekha and her seven best friends race against time to save the world, with her famous cry of "We are all of One Race, the Human Race".

Rekha - a mother of two and a government auditor - was an ordinary woman who died without fanfare yet thousands came for her funeral.

She did not die "being blown up in a secluded forest, while she was still half alive with dynamite half strapped to her chest, for which the courts decided it was not necessary to determine the killer's motive”.

One of those who came to pay his respects was blogger Bernard Khoo, who goes by the moniker Zorro Unmasked.

Shankar, who also blogs at Don'tPlayPuks, says it is Khoo - a former school teacher - who encouraged him to contact Gerak Budaya to get the book published - and that adding names of real people, several other bloggers included, adds to the "fun", while giving life to the fiction.

Clues that lead to Malaysia

The character of Pulipore or Tiger Isle ex-president Bhairav has an uncanny similarity to one of our prime ministers while there is mention of current premier Kapalin that plays "every card, from race to religion, to hounding his political nemesis Maitreya with trumped-up rape and sodomy charges".

Leading us further on familiar trails is the inclusion of Kapalin's ambitious, self-promoting and spendthrift wife, and the RM250,000 Omega wrist watch from the Saudi prince worked into the plot.

azlanThere are sordid tales of how millions or billions are being derived to finance the election campaigns of the United National Tigerists Association (a religious political party), including paying for extravagant lifestyles of ministers, chief ministers, members of Parliament and well-connected party members.

One can hardly put down Shankar's book for it is full of suspense, you might feel as if you are in a theatre watching a fast-paced thriller, turning the pages quickly.

It helps that the chapters are short and crisp, while dialogues are witty and humorous, allowing the reader no opportunity to feel bored or to wander off the plot.

Shankar thinks of all kinds of interesting though lengthy names for his colourful characters like: Tigerist Chandrika Morning Glory Chandran (the ex-president's shapely secretary); Sri Mahamaya Lion's Mane Jellyfish Chandran (government nominee for the Energy, Alternative resources and Green technology Minister); or Sri Sanatkumar Mutthiah Muralidharan-koh (a half Tamil, half Chinese ‘fraudtreprenuer’, in other words, a big time crony).

'Corruption not exclusive to Malaysia'

When asked if he draws his inspiration from the current political events in the country, Shankar says he is a keen observer of Malaysian and international politics.

"A Malaysian writer cannot operate out of a vacuum, and must draw on, and interpret local issues for some of the background material for the fiction book. But not all," said Shankar, in an interview with Malaysiakini.

bribe and corruption malaysia"While readers may indulge in second guessing the characters and incidents in the novel, corruption is not exclusive to Malaysia," he added.

He pointed to two "shocking and salacious" on-going corruption trial in Singapore involving ex-senior government officials; huge billion dollar financial scandals in Thailand, and similar incidences in other parts of Asia.

He added that such cases were also rampant in USA, South America and Europe, where it is referred to as lobbying and commissions, the new name for the old backhander “Baksheesh”!

Why does he use such lengthy names for his characters, the reader may wonder.

Shankar said the common cultural origins in SEA are principally linked to India, and when you combine this with aboriginal and Muslim names, you can get some pretty long names.

They were very specifically picked to reflect his characters and (denial of) their Indian origins, he added.

"The objective in coining these long names was to show the now virtually completely mixed DNA of the peoples of SEA, if not the whole world," said Shankar, who hails from Kuala Lumpur.

"Whither a pure race? I want people to be aware of the 2009 amendment to the United Nations Charter which now reads:

‘6. Reaffirms that all peoples and individuals constitute one human family, rich in diversity, and that all human beings are born free and equal in dignity and rights; and strongly rejects any doctorine of racial superiority along with theories which attempt to determine the existence of so-called distinct human races’ ”.

Malaysians must make a stand

Shankar, who formerly worked as general manager and director in private companies, started writing the novel in July 2010, completing it in December, a relatively short six months for a debut novel.

Yet, at his age - he turns 60 next March - he does not feel that this is flattering when the ideas have been floating in his mind for about 20 years.

"It took a lot of soul searching to write this novel; you can understand my worries, concerns and fears," said the father-of-two.

"With all this talk of Official Secrets Act, Internal Security Act and defamation lawsuits flying all around, I really had to cross the Rubicon," said Shankar who, before this, published a memoir of his school days at the Victoria Institution while working on another novel, which is still unpublished.

A former consultant at two public listed real estate companies, Shankar's major hurdle in publishing Tiger Isle is finding a foreign literary agent or publisher.

NONEHowever, to publish the novel, he said he was driven by the motivation that "Malaysians must make a stand if they perceive their government has now evolved into, and replaced, by the Mafia".

Shankar's book will be launched today at 7pm at the Royal Selangor Club, followed by a panel discussion on 'Say No To Corruption', led by PKR's director of strategy Rafizi Ramli (above).



by nikon lensman, Donplaypuks® at intrepid correspondent for trafficking all fine country affairs

In the Yes Minister BBC TV sitcom series of the late '70's and '80's, a novice minister is educated on very precise and useful techniques by the Chief Secretary to the Government, Sir Humphrey Appleby (was there ever a more wicked civil serpent?), on how to answer difficult questions posed by journalists or opposition politicians. One such technique was for the Minister to say, "No, that's not the real question. The real question is.." and then go off at a tangent. And then of course, there's always that life-saver of all serving Ministers - "As it may have national and possibly, even regional and global, security and/or economic/financial implications, I am afraid I cannot venture a clear answer at this juncture. An independent government inquiry...'

It is clear that many of our Prime Ministers and Ministers must be great fans of the Yes, Minister series, given too that London is their favourite holiday haunt, notwithstanding a sterling:ringgit exchange rate of about 5:1 with London being one of the most expensive cities in the world! Within the space of a week, three Ministers have deflected embarrassing questions by answering question that were not asked.

In the $40 million unexplained money for which a Malaysian Currency Mule was arrested in Hong Kong, Minister Nazi answered that it was not illegal for UMNO to receive donations from foreign parties. Incredibly, the PM weighed in with the claim that the question of smuggling did not arise. No one had asked them those questions.

The real question was, given the fact there was grave suspicion that this $40 million was suspected to have been accumulated from illegal kickbacks from Sabah timber concessionaires linked to UMNO Sabah, why hadn't the MACC found anyone worthy of being charged for corruption? If it was not tainted money, why was it hand-carried and smuggled into Hong Kong, instead of being transferred officially into Malaysia by bank telegraphic transfer from Switzerland, where sat another $52 million? Very stinky, you say?

Zahid Hamedi, Minister of Defence, then followed suit by claiming that Navy morale and national security were undermined by the Opposition taking potshots at the operational capabilities of its Scorpene submarines. But really, lately, no one asked him that question. What many have been asking is, how after 6 years, neither PM Najib nor Polis Diraja Malaysia has identified and prosecuted the person(s) who ordered the murder of Altantuya?

But, sometime back (two years or more ago), it was the Minister himself who subjected the Navy and national security to ridicule by formally announcing that, "the inability of the $3.8 billion Scorpene submarine to dive will not hamper the sub's operations!" He also waffled something about the brand new submarines not having previously been tested in the warm waters of the tropics!

Not to be outdone, Kong Cho Ha, Minister for Transport, announced today that "The Silent Majority Want the Automated Enforcement System (AES)." No one asked him what the silent majority thought or wanted; and after all, if the majority were silent, how would the Minister know what they thought or wanted? 

Okay, let's first get rid of this $700 million AES price tag to be borne entirely by the concessionaires. The CCTV cameras were quoted at $350 million, and presumably, the balance of $350 million will be for software, installation, commissioning, processing, administration, staffing and finance costs. The 1:1 ratio for hardware:non-hardware does seem way too high. Even if the government is not paying for it, there's the question of the AES concessionaires amortising $700 million of costs before arriving at the profit sharing sum between them and us. So, is it not in the government's interest to carry out an audit to ascertain these costs are genuine and not inflated? How difficult is it for a nation of Ali Baba's and rent seekers to artificially inflate costs by appointing intermediary "buying agents", as alleged against certain parties in the Scorpene submarine fiasco?

But then, why is the contract wrapped around the Official Secrets Act? Once again, UNCONSTITUTIONALLY, the details and terms and conditions of a public contract are being concealed from public scrutiny. Why? What happened to PM Najibs' 1 transparency and accountability? What is the government really hiding from us?

The other real questions are:

1. Why would any government privatise traffic offence collection which has been doing nicely for its coffers for 55 years?

2. Why would it contemplate privatisation when the potential gross income from a new AES approach could be as much as a stratospheric $50 billion a year to the Treasury, making it possible to abolish road tax and tolls and buy out all the crony blood-sucking toll highway and city road concessionaires within a few years?

3. Why would the government farm out this contract, when with the huge potential income from the AES traffic fines, it could easily finance the project by itself, or if necessary, via bank loans? After all the traffic division of PDRM has been handling this issue since like forever!

 So, the collective stench from all these irrelevant questions, diversions and answers is solid proof that it is not the PEOPLE, their interests or safety which the rogue government of PM Najib and BUMNO/BN is giving priority to. Their not-so-subtle machinations are transparently geared to lining the pockets of croneys so that they can secure a steady cashflow to fight the coming elections and thereafter, and keep themselves liquid for their London, New York, Paris, Washington, Munich, Switzerland, Argentina, Tokyo and Sydney jaunts!

Donplaypuks® with fraud, man! We can smell you a mile away!



by Donplaypuks® at

There can be no doubt that Gardenia Bakeries (K.L.) Sdn. Bhd. (“Gardenia - So Good You Can Even Eat It On Its Own”) has arrived at its pre-eminent pole position in the bread supply industry in Malaysia, through sheer hard work and fair competition, a hallmark and cornerstone of free markets and democracy. 

Currently, Gardenia is the market leader in the bread supply business. This did not happen overnight. They had to change the old fashioned and pretty much localised bread and related products manufacturing and vendor distribution systems, to go national. 

Growing consumer awareness called for better bread formulation, choice and manufacturing, storage, distribution and storage hygiene standards. It's no accident Gardenia bread does not go mouldy easily or quickly. New and modern factories had to be built brick by brick from scratch. New industry standards and systems had to be set up and staff recruited and trained for ISO and Halal certification. True entrepreneurship and free market competition, like genius, is all about 90% perspiration and 10% inspiration!

The profits derived from such dominance were bound to invite new players hoping to chip away at Gardenia’s market share, even with the daunting entry barrier of upwards of RM100 million for a start-up brand new bakery production plant and factory. Factor in the cost of setting up a national distribution system which puts fresh bread on the shelves of hypermarkets, supermarkets and mini marts daily, and you will begin to understand that this is no game for rank amateurs, small boys or those hoping to make a quick buck and run.

Such is the not-so-funny predicament Gardenia finds itself in today.

Where big business interests are locked in a tussle for market share, truth and justice are often sacrificed for a premium, in this instance, a huge one. While Gardenia’s competitors have publicly denied any complicity in it, and there are no reasons to doubt them, anonymous, suspicious and sneaky supporters of big business interests have been busy exploiting racism and politics in an attempt to shift consumers away from Gardenia, to its competitors.

Internet ghosts, and even Facebook campaigners, have been promoting the ‘Boycott Gardenia’ rabid cry with grossly misinformed and unsubstantiated claims that for every loaf of Gardenia bread one buys, 16 cents goes to Rosmah and the coffers of UMNO/BN! The mysterious authors of these vicious and racist email and other hate-attacks against Gardenia seem to be targeting the Chinese in particular, to alter their spending and eating habits in favour of competing brands.

So, where do we start? With the facts, of course!

  1. Gardenia is 70% owned by QAF Ltd. which is publicly listed on the Singapore Stock Exchange. The remaining 30% shareholding was sold to BERNAS at a premium in 2001, in line with MITI’s conditions for granting Gardenia a manufacturing licence. This was long, long before Syed Mokhtar took control of BERNAS via Tradewinds in 2009 and Rosmah was anywhere within sight of Putrajaya! 
  2. Since 1986 when Gardenia set up operations in Malaysia, it has invested over RM800 million in 5 (fully halal compliant) plant and manufacturing facilities, all in Shah Alam in the Kelang Valley.
  3. Currently, Gardenia employs about 2,500 personnel, 2,200 of whom comprise Malaysians. The CEO of the company and top managers and staff are all also Malaysians. The company does not employ Singaporeans or any other nationals, other than 300 foreign workers engaged in the production, packaging and distribution lines.
  1. Although, in view of its 30% shareholdings, Bernas has board of directors representation in Gardenia, it has NEVER interfered in Gardenia’s operations or management, nor ever forced it to buy flour from Syed Mokhtar-controlled companies. In fact, in over 25 years of production, Gardenia has not bought a single gram of flour from any flour mill owned by Bernas, Syed Mokhtar Bukhari or UMNO.
  2. Four out of seven directors on the board of directors of Gardenia (including 2 from Bernas) are Malaysians. A quick check at the Companies Commission of Malaysia will confirm this for a fact.
  1. Gardenia has not bought any flour from Federal Flour Mills (FFM) owned by the Robert Kuok Group, for over 10 years!!! Therefore, the vicious and deliberately falsified and concocted information circulated in November 2011 that Bernas or Syed Mokhtar Bukhari or Rosmah or UMNO had suddenly instructed Gardenia to terminate business with FFM has absolutely no basis whatsoever!
  2. Every bread company has its own secret flour formulations and ingredients for its range of products - white bread, wholemeal, bun, waffle etc. Gardenia decided to part ways with FFM shortly after 1998 when FFM took to also supplying formulated flour to Gardenia’s new competitor. Gardenia then shifted its orders to other flour millers as they felt there was a conflict of interest issue with FFM which could not be resolved. 
  3. Clearly, Gardenia’s move to turn to other local flour millers as far back as 1998 was a commercial and business decision, to protect its trade secrets. The question of race had no bearing whatsoever on its strategic directions then, or even now.
  4. In any event, Gardenia had got wind of FFM’s intentions to launch its own brand of bread before they actually did in 2011. Only a fool would allow his competitors to prosper at his own expense!
So, where does all this lead us to?

This blog has a masthead which says 'We Are All of 1 Race, the Human Race.' In plain, simple English, I abhor racism in any form - overt, covert, subtle, what have you. This scurrilous attempt by a group of, obviously Chinese, Malaysians to appeal to extreme chauvinism in commercial business matters is as in-your-face racism as you can get. Nothing is more detestable!

With one breath they criticise Mahathirism, Ibrahim Ali and Perkasa because they repeatedly bring out the bogeyman of DAP being anti-Malay, anti-monarchy, pro-republic, anti-affirmative action etc., to try and scare Malay voters into thinking they have no alternative to UMNO/BN being the government. With the next, they brand every issue involving UMNO and Syed Mokhtar Bukhary with the same racist brush.

Only Prime Minister Najib and Robert Kuok know the real truth behind why Kuok exited the sugar business in Malaysia with indecent haste. It may well have had everything to do with UMNO's paranoia with wanting Malays/Bumiputras to control as much of the food and agricultural business in Malaysia as possible; and that in itself is also an extreme form of racist thinking and philosophy. After all Robert Kuok has been in the sugar and flour and other highly successful businesses here for well-nigh 50 years. He is as Malaysian as they come! He's listed in Forbes rankings as the richest Malaysian, not Chinese. 

Was Rober Kuok arm-twisted? Made an offer he could not refuse? Possibly. But he did get paid market price for his shares, if that's any consolation. It would also be pertinent to point out that our  government has been subsidising flour, oil and sugar for the last 50 years, to the tune of billions of ringgit every year. Guess whose businesses have been some of the happy beneficiaries of these taxpayer-funded largesse?

To leap from the un-sweet shenanigans of Najib, to equating the Gardenia vs Robert Kuok's and FFM's Massimo Bread to another strong-arming and sidelining of Chinese business interest, has no foundation whatsoever. Currently, Gardenia's main formulated flour supplier is controlled by the Teh family from Perak, while it's other major supplier is owned by Indonesian and Australian parties. So, where do stories of Malaysian Chinese business interest being decimated come from? I suspect that race is being exploited to scare the Chinese in the same way that Mahathir, Ibrahim Ali and Perkasa employ it as a tactical weapon to keep the people apart.

Gardenia bread is unhealthy? Prove it, but don't blind us with spurious statistics and dubious analysis. Gardenia is more expensive? Well, what are you complaining about? The consumer is king when he has choice. But, do take cognizance that cheap and quality are usually trade-offs. There is a reason why super-pricey Rolls Royce, BMW and Mercedes outsell Proton and why Nike, Adidas and Reebok sports shoes fly off store shelves while Bata's Badminton Master Shoe appears to be an almost forgotten name!

These racists are also doing a great disservice to themselves and insulting ALL Malaysians by posting UK 'dead rat in bread' pictures on the Internet and Facebook, implying recklessly falsely that Gardenia bread is unhygienic and poisonous. How low can they get!

With the Police and the Malaysian Communications and Multimedi Commission (MCMC) investigations nearing completion, it will not be long before the identities of these racists are revealed, and prosecutions commence. Nevertheless, it's very sad indeed that after 55 years of independence, many here still look at issues like these from the viewpoint of Malays, Chinese, Indians and others.

The milking of racist sentiments to corner profits is a hallmark of typical Malaysian fraudtrepreneurs and their croneys who cannot go to the toilet without demanding an all-risks free government-guaranteed handout. In that respect, Gardenia comes out smelling of sweet roses with full marks for entrepreneurship, competitive spirit, corporate social responsibility and a truly successful company.

Donplaypuks® at



by dick hardon kinsey MD, Donplaypuks® intrepid correspondents for human sex affairs

"A US gynaecologist claims to have found the G-spot, a supposed pleasure centre on the front interior wall of the vagina, but some critics say not so fast. Adam Ostrzenski said he has confirmed the presence of the G-spot after extracting a tiny well-delineated sac structure. The G-spot, named after German gynaecologist Ernst Graefenberg, who first mooted its existence in 1950, is said to be a highly sensitive area in the vagina that, when stimulated, gives a woman a powerful orgasm." Journal of Sexual Medicine. 28 April 2012.

But, Donplaypuks® and his team of intrepid sex(y) scientists have long known that, as usual, the Americans and Germans are terribly and awfully wrong. As they are about trillion dollar government bailouts favouring Wall St. and Greece, and why the western economic model has failed. (Favour cronies, encourage collosal ponzi get-rich-schemes and continue to encourage an economy based on speculating on the stock exchange and forex/futures market? Then, the collapse of the west is imminent!)

What Donplaypuks® and his team of intrepid sex(y) scientists have discovered is that there are several types of G-spots located on several specific places on and within the human body, i.e. on both male AND female bodies. They are:

1. The Grossmahjib G-spots

These will be found at three locations on the female anatomy. 

The first Grossmahjib G-spot is to be found at the centre of a balding female's forehead. This G-spot, when caressed, will send its owner spining into illusions of grandeur, to such an extent that she will think she is Royalty and First Lady of Mongolia, Putrajaya or Curtin University, acronimized as FLOM, FLOP and FLOCU. 

She will start throwing grand and extravagant dinners and engagement parties costing millions of dollars that would embarass Queen Elizabeth, and then pass the bill to the government. It will create a penchant for $74 million diamond rings from Jacob's Cracko Biscuits of New York.

The second and third Grossmahjib G-spot are to be found at the centre of the back of the palm of the female hands. When tickled, breathed upon or kissed on this G-spot, the female will have a frenzied desire for, not well dileanated sacs, but oversized $200,000 Birkin handbags which can be ordered through, at no cost and be personally delivered by, carperbagger Dibagpack Jaikishahjahan and his wife, Tajmumtaz Very Mahal. Call 888-8888 8888 at Sucessful Corp HQ.

2. The Gajibuta Goondu G-spot

The Gajibuta Goondu G-spot is located primarily in the male anatomy of BUMNO/BN Prime Ministers and (Wooden) Cabinet members, in the region 'where the sun don't shine.' Occasionally, a female may possess one too, like a certain lady dubbed "Minister of Cowgate."

It is much sought after by "got free $1 billion contract or not?" BUMNO/BN members and civil serpents who fervently believe the sun does shine out from the male anatomy of BUMNO/BN Prime Ministers and (Wooden) Cabinet members, out of the region 'where the sun don't shine into.'

Many are forced to take up Yoga classes (banned by fatwa) since their hips and necks must have a high degree of flexibilty to bend over and kiss ass for high paying, no-work government paid jobs and contracts. Busy 1M Prime Ministers often outsource these functions to their con-sultant drivers hired by 1Israel APCO. They are referred to as Pemadu Gajibuta Goondu Roti Jala Transformers.

3.The Ging Gang Gooli Gooli G-spot

If ass-kissing does not work, then tickling, or better still, if you have a probing tongue, licking the outer base of the pouch encasing the goolies of BUMNO/BN Prime Ministers and (Wooden) Cabinet members while singing the ging gang gooli gooli song will usually do the trick. Here are the lyrics to the ging gang gooli gooli song:
Oompah, oompah, oompah, oompah.
Ging gang goolie goolie goolie goolie watchagot not billion $ contract?
Ging gang poo, ging gang poo.
Ging gang goolie goolie goolie goolie watchagot not billion $ contrac?
Ging gang poo, ging gang poo.
Make hay lah, while the sun shines, make hay lah, hay lah ho,
Make hay lah, while the sun shines, make hay lah, hay lah ho,
Shaft the willy, shaft the willy, shaft the willy, willy nilly,
Oompah, oompah, oompah, oompah
4. The G-String G-spot

This is the much favoured sport of G-spot watching of Chief Ministers, State Assemblymen, civil serpents and top management of government losing concerns.

It is the preferred route to wangling first class travel and all-expenses paid government sponsored "overseas study cum travel" trips to the higly acclaimed belly dancing educational institutions in Bangkok, Dubai, Morocco and Beirut, for "Research & Development" purposes. Aftre all, belly dancers hang out in hip circles. However, the Ministry of Defence sends our admirals to the top calibre Navel Academy for their G-String G-spot training.

Do you know of any other G-spots we have missed out?

Donplaypuks® with G-spotting, man!



by don't rock d boat rockefeller, Donplaypuks® intrepid correspondent for Oh No, God affairs
Whenever pro-BUMNO bloggers and children associated with a certain Maha Firaun wax lyrical about $62 billion Oil&Gas projects rising up to a stupendous $170 billion in investments and 40,000 local jobs, you always get a creepy feeling. The blood chills and the atmosphere gets very cloudy. You know there's got to be a catch somewhere.

CLICK HERE and CLICK HERE for the sugar-coated version of, if the converted are to be believed, this unfolding project which will propel us into the first world, just, just a few years from now.....when....(if) it happens.

But to get an independent view and a broader picture of what has happened so far, we need to go elsewhere, to the real world, where "clean" projects like Lynas are stripped bare to their naked essentials so we can make a proper and fair judgement.

CLICK HERE for Lim Sue Goan of Sin Chew's post reproduced by Malaysian Insider, for the "unimportant bits and pieces" left out by Sydetious Ali.

LSG's main concerns are:

1. This was a project originally REJECTED by the Government of Taiwan because it failed the Environment Impact Assessment (EIS) test in 2008! In 2011, President MaYing-jeou of Taiwan withdrew his support for the project. So, why is our Government rushing in where angels fear to tread?

2. The project was rejected in Taiwan because it would have consumed 400,000 tons of water per day, thus affecting wetlands, land and waters earmarked for food production.

3. To quote LSG of MI, "In addition, it was estimated that 339 to 565 people would die of cardiovascular diseases and lung cancer, while patients of respiratory diseases would also increase due to the PM2.5 pollutants released into the air."

4. 20,000 jobs would have been created in Taiwan, but the social costs would have escalated to NT100 billion EVERY YEAR in Taiwan!!!!!!!

Expert and public opinion were consulted, and research conducted for 6 years before the Taiwan Government decided to say no.

Now, let's fast forward to the truly Asia fascia world of Malaysia, where transparency and accountability are often, er, temporarily suspended, of course, in the genuine interest of our fellow citizens, for the sake of expediency.

1. Does anyone recall experts and public opinion being gauged on the pros and cons of this project or its location in Pengerang, Johor?

2. Is anyone aware of any EIA Report commissioned, and if so, what it's findings were? What are the annually projected social costs vs commercial benefits in ringgit billions?

3. What will be the short term and long term effects on the livelihoods of farmers and fishermen in Pengerang, Johor and on wetlands and nearby coastal areas and seas? Where will all the toxic waste from the project be stored, dumped or pumped out to?

4. Why is this project, like bedevilled Lynas (12 years), given Pioneer (Tax Free) Status of 10 years? What exactly are the respective role of Petronas, Diolog Plc, Taiwan party and the Johor State Government in this mega project?

5. Who sold the land (22,500 acres) to whom at what valuation, if any? Has Johor State or the Federal Government and/or Ministers issued "letters of support" which can be misconstrued (by mysterious bodholders) as cast iron GUARANTEES? If so, for how much? We don't want another $12.5 billion ringgit fiasco as per the Port Kelang Free Trade Zone to erupt in our face, do we?

6. Most importantly, who will be left carrying the baby if the project is fucked and far away from home or up the shit creek without a paddle or left with an unwanted bunny in the oven or..............(fill in the blanks for your favourite expression for the Malaysian taxpayer).

This seems to be the modus operandi of BUMNO/BN. Sign the directly negotiated contract and incur billions in start-up costs. Pollution, cancer, lung-related diseases? Toxic chemicals and effluents? Belakang Kira (We'll deal with it later)!

The devil is always in the details, which is perhaps one reason why the details are always classied under "Official Secrets" in 1Malaysia?

 Donplaypuks® with our environment and future, man!



by Donplaypuks®

The two demonstrations, one by Perkasa outside Penang Chief Minister Lim Guan Eng's house, and the other by Ikhlas oustide Ambiga's, of Bersih fame, mark a new low in Malaysian politics. The demonstrators, and their yellow backers in the corridors of BUMNO/BN, have appealed to the lowest common denominator among the worst in their ranks - racism, demagoguery and thuggery!

Given also that our law enforcers (not just the police, but also City Hall officials) stood by and did nothing to disperse these illegal gatherings, while at Bersih 3.0 they opened direct fire at crowds with tear gas and pepper-laced water without justifiable provocation, it's clear what we have is a rogue regime that MUST be booted out at the next general elections, if we wish to preserve the sanctity of our democratic institutions.

Why rogue regime? Because we have a Prime Minister (PM) who is implicated up to his eyeballs in the $7 billion Scorpene Submarine financial scandal (he was also the Defence Minister who signed the contracts) and who 5 years onwards, has not ordered the Inspector General of Police to investigate, identify and charge the person who gave the orders to murder Altantuya and blow up her body into bits and pieces with C4 plastics, generally available only to the Army, and perhaps, the Terrorist Squad of the Police. PM Najib has not done so despite the convicted murderers of Altantuya confessing to the police that they were offered $100,000 (by whom?) to carry out their heinous act!

This is not mere uncouth behaviour by Perkasa and Ikhlas. Their intention is to instill mafia-type fear through intimidation, thuggery and gangsterism! The gall of it, for Ikhlas to offer a hamburger to Ambiga who is a vegetarian. Imagine if Ambiga or Guan Eng had offered a pork bun to Mohd. Ridzuan Abdullah and Ibrahim Ali. But that is a minor matter. What is at issue is whether Perkasa and Ikhlas considered the fear and terror they would have instilled, not in Ambiga's and Gua Eng's hearts, for they are made of sterner stuff, but in the hearts of children and the elderly living in those homes and that of their innocent neighbours.

Of course Ikhlas and its petty traders will maintain that the Bersih 3.0 rally on 28th April 2012 caused them huge financial losses and they have their rights. Yes, they have their rights and no one disputes that. However, the courts are the rightful place to take their grievances to, not the homes of their perceived antagonists. 

Frankly, I doubt these hamburger patty-mentality lackeys will dare open up their books to be audited independently by the courts to justify any claims. 

Similarly, the Opposition in Penang - BUMNO/BN - were defeated in the State Asembly by the very same tactics and open and democratic procedures that they had employed from 1957-2007, when they were in power. Their allegations that Chief Minister Lim Guan Eng had cast slurs on BUMNO/BN by saying that more Hindu temples would be torn down if BUMNO/BN were in power, was not borne out by official Hansard transcripts of the debate in the State Assembly. That calls for an invasion of Guan Eng's home and incantations of a death wish?

So, how do we read the situation?

It's obvious they are being stirred up by other cravenly cowards and Nazi and Stalinistic elements within BUMNO/BN. Has the unelected mayor of KL who pontificated to Bersih 3.0 about laws and municipal by-laws or our unelected PM Najib or BUMNO/BN politicians and former IGP's come out and publicly condemned these blatant and dangerously precedent setting invasions of an individual's privacy, as they (wrongly) did with Bersih 3.0? They are playing with fire and when it's they who get burnt, who shall they then lay the blame on?

They silently wish and pray Guan Eng, Ambiga, Bersih and Pakatan would all quietly disappear. Let me assure these pathetic troglodytes that all their pilgrimages and prayers will not deliver them victory because they represent pure, unadulterated evil against the might of Pakatan, Ambiga, Guan Eng et al who stand on the side of the righteous! 

BUMNO/BN is also being shown up by the new State governments, in particular, Penang and Selangor, that where the leaders are incorruptible, desirable progress will naturally follow. So, it's not surprising that the Pakatan states combined have attracted more Foreign Direct Investments (FDI) in four years than all the BUMNO/BN ruled States put together, and praised by the BUMNO/BN appointed Auditor General for that as well as for their transparency and accountability. Now, that's what you call real progress and achievement - when your are grudgingly congratulated by independent parties for your successes. BUMNO/BN leaders are too seduced by the bootlicking and scrotum tickling  antics of its sycophantic and demanding 'give me a billion ringgit contract' supporters.

This is what grates on BUMNO/BN's behind more than anything else, like sandpaper on rock. The Pakatan States have shown in four years what progress we could have achieved, had we not allowed ourselves to succumb to 32 years of financial mayhem and utter corruption and waste involving hundreds of billions of ringgit under the BUMNO/BN aegis.

And if this is the best they can do, by trying to frighten and intimidate the citizenry, then I say, bring it on. You will scare no  one, because it is your own fear that motivates you, not any concern for truth, justice or democracy! The lowest common denominator you appeal to - racism, demagoguery, religious bigotry and thuggery - will be contemptibly rejected by all right thinking citizens, without a second thought!

Donplaypuks® at our homes, man!



or egg in the face of unelected little hitler mayors and prime ministers

by Donplaypuks®

So, it is the morning after. 

Did Bersih 3.0 achieve its 280412 objectives?

You can bet your unelected little hitler mayor's puckered little ass, it did. The massive turnout of 250,000 in Kuala Lumpur alone should send a strong message to Prime Minister Najib that this was no mere flash in the pan. It was an ever bigger international success than Bersih 2.0. Contrary to many a BUMNO blogger prediction, at lest half of those who turned up yesterday were Malaysian Malays.

It also achieved much more than that.

Never before have the citizens of Malaysia been more aware, more so with the shocking disclosure two days ago the the Election Commission Chairman and his Deputy are both UMNO members, that we have an inalienable right to a level playing field for General Elections 13. That the first step to achieving this is to strip bare the EC and re-build it.

Present too at Bersih 3.0 were the 'Stop Lynas' green t-shirted protest groups from Pahang who have every right to demand our government stop the Lynas Radioactive Rare Earth Project plant in Gebeng, Pahang, until they have cast iron guarantees on the safe storage of dangerous chemical and disposal of radioactive tailings (with half-life of 14 billion years) and chemical residues and waste. Our government too is unable to answer why, when this project was rejected by the Australian government with its known high standards, ours is "rushing in where angels fear to tread."

But first let me dismiss with utter contempt that contemptible old fart talk-with-english apple-in-your mouth waffling twerp Vice-Chairman of DAP, Senator Tunku Abdul Aziz who appeared irked that Bersih 3.0 advocated, aw shucks, breaking our laws of peaceful assembly. Isn't that just one step away from Communism? It has not escaped the notice of many that this Tunku now rubs shoulders with such newly appointed scintillating senators like Nallakaruppan and Ezam Mohd. Nor, which has raised the bar at our rubber-stamping Senate from just about zero foot to negative 6 feet.

Bersih 1.0 broke the requirements of the Internal Security Act (ISA) and the ban on assembly of more than four persons in public. Hundreds of thousands, including some prominent BUMNO bloggers who then marched in defiance of our statutes, now murmur about the legality of Bersih 3.0. Security was NOT then an issue, but suddenly, it now is?

In Bersih 2.0 last July, the police broke the law first by arbitrarily arresting people wearing yellow t-shirts, even before the day of the event! Then they ISA'd the heroic giant-slayer of Sungei Siput, MP Dr. Michael Jeyakumar Devaraj (and five others) of the Socialist Party on the flimsiest and lamest of pretexts that he was sallying forth to "wage war against the King and country" on his way to Penang in the north, when our King was in Kuala Lumpur!

How about DAP MP Teresa Kok and that Sin Chew newspaper reporter being falsely arrested under the ISA "for their own safety!" Which Constitution and law were the authorities following?

So, let us stop pretending that the law must never be broken. Otherwise, Malaya would never have gained Independence from the British, would it?

If a particular law is a bad ass (oppressive to the extent it is equivalent to a denial of our inalienable human right), then bad ass mamas and papas are entitled to break it with impunity. Remember, inalienable means it is given by God to us. So, no human or government can take it away from us.

(This pic was taken at about 7.30 a.m. at Dataran Merdeka on 28/04/12, in the full view of about a hundred policemen. So, we broke the law. Big deal! You see panic-stricken policemen anywhere, rushing to fire tear gas at us?). 

Up till 3 p.m. yesterday, the Bersih 3.0 crowd was cheerful, boisterous, jocular and well behaved. No one came there with thoughts of riot, rebellion or "imperilling the security of the nation." This, despite, on Unelected Mayor Ahmad Fuad's instructions, the police having turned Dataran Merdeka into a war-like zone replete with barbwire barricades.

Precisely a minute after Ambiga and Anwar left, all hell broke loose. The cops fired tear gas and sprayed the crowd with pepper and chemical laced water. They did not issue any prior warning. My family and I were fortunate to escape being stampeded on, though we got two whiffs of tear gas/chemical water. But somehow we recovered fast, while hundreds around us were vomiting, wheezing and dripping from the nose. It took us an hour, after making representations to the police at barricades at Jalan Sultan Ismail and Jalan Kucing, to walk from Jalan Tunku Abdul Rahman back to the Bank Negara vicinity where our car was parked.

I do not blame the 7,000 rank-and-file policemen and FRU for the chaos that ensued at Dataran Merdeka. I do not blame or condemn them for pulling the tear gas trigger. The fault for well over 30 years in Malaysia has been with the top leadership at government and police. If fish rot in the head first, our government leaders are a putrid lot of festering, suppurating and fetid scum who stink from head to toe. Those who gave the orders. Nevertheless, it does not help if our policemen are brainwashed by the BTN propaganda machinery, and will not exercise discretion. As observed as far back as Nuremberg in 1946, there are some orders no one has to, or should, follow.

The fault lies to a large extent with unelected Prime Minister Najib and Home Minister 'Kersimudin' Hishamuddin, but mostly with unelected Mayor of Kuala Lumpur, Ahmad Fuad. And that is exactly how the script was planned, written and executed. A little charade.

It demonstrates exactly what is wrong with Malaysia. In the Federal Territory of Kuala Lumpur, 11 out of 12 Members of Parliament (MP) comprise those from Opposition parties. Yet, the Mayor of KL is appointed by the Prime Minister as is the Minister of Federal Territory, Dato Raja Nong Chik, who is not an elected MP but got in through the backdoor by first being appointed a Senator! So, the 11 elected Opposition MP's have no say whatsoever in the administration of Kuala Lumpur.

Ever since PM Najib appointed APCO PR spinmasters for $78 million to improve relations with USA and pave the way for more Foreign Direct Investment (FDI), he has been playing this little game. On the one hand, he will do everything (including breaking the law) to cling on to power, and on the other, he must project this image of being a liberal and a great proponent of human rights to continue attracting FDI's. So, this yes, no; yes, no game which he plays with Kerismudin in which he has now inducted the latest patsy, unelected Mayor of KL, Ahmad Fuad Ismail, who true to form, played to perfection the role of Little Hitler.

When the PM of the country, The Home Minister and Minister of Federal Territories all had no objection to Bersih 3.0, and had declared it as "not a security threat", where exactly was Fuad coming from? Dataran Merdeka, a historic place, therefore out of bound for Bersih 3.0? Tell me, which part of KL is not historic. But then, in the '90's a Mahathir fiat banished cricket, hockey, rugby and tennis from the Dataran field. Mahathir then approved the sale of the historic Merdeka Stadium to the Renong Group for real estate development.You think these philistines really care about what is historic and what is not?

And had National Laureate Samad Said and Ambiga first suggested holding the rally at Merdeka Stadium, you think PM Najib and Fuad would have waved it through? Yet, they would not allow Bersih 2.0 to be held at Merdeka Stadium. What was the flimsy excuse then? Then there was Fuad talking about a potential "security threat" with Perkasa threatening to march on 28/04/12 as well. Fuad, do you need five year old kids to educate you? You could not have asked PM Najib to rule that peaceful gatherings should be allowed on a first-come-first-served basis and that Perkasa could have Dataran all to themselves the following Saturday, and then request the police to enforce that?

Bah, two-faced humbugs! Shameless hypocrites!

So, this is the game, where opposition is concerned.

But the citizenry is not stupid. They will continue to break every single oppressive law because our elected and unelected leaders themselves break the laws with impunity. When you push people to the wall, they will eventually fight back. And so long as the PM, Cabinet, IGP, AG and police WILL NOT bring to book the person(s) who gave the order to murder and blow up Altantuya (in 18/10/2006) with C4 plastic explosives, they constitute an illegal rogue regime that has not a strand of moral fibre to stand on in preaching to anyone about not breaking any law.